Memorial Day. First one away from Norfolk. First one without Dad standing in the backyard at 0600 facing east.
Ryan was on base for the memorial ceremony. I watched it from a distance — the formation, the flag, the bugle, the rows of Marines in dress blues standing at attention for the ones who didn't come home. It hits different when you're married to one of them. When the person standing in formation is your person, your husband, the man who made you bad pancakes on Mother's Day. The flag isn't abstract anymore. It's the thing he serves under. It's the thing that could take him.
I didn't go to the ceremony. Wives are welcome but I wasn't ready — not ready to stand in the crowd with the other wives and the children and the folded programs and the weight of it. Jen went. She took Dylan in a stroller and stood in the sun and listened. She's braver than me about this. Or more practiced.
After the ceremony, Ryan and I barbecued in the tiny backyard of our apartment — if you can call a six-by-eight patch of grass a backyard. Ryan grilled burgers (he's improving — Dad's 'flip sooner' advice has been internalized) and I made Mom's potato salad from the recipe card. First attempt.
The potato salad was... close. The potatoes were a little overcooked (they started to fall apart when I mixed in the dressing), and I used too much mustard, but the bones were right. Red potatoes, hard-boiled eggs, celery, onion, mayo, mustard, pickle relish, salt, pepper. The formula was Mom's. The execution was mine.
I called Dad. 'Happy Memorial Day, Dad.'
'Same to you, kiddo. How's Ryan?'
'He's good. He was at the ceremony.'
Silence. The specific silence of a veteran on Memorial Day, when 'good' means alive and the alternative is the reason for the ceremony.
'Tell him I'm proud of him,' Dad said. Not 'thanks for his service.' Not a platitude. 'I'm proud of him.' From one military man to another. From a father to a son-in-law. From a veteran who lost friends to a Marine who carries their memory.
I told Ryan. He nodded. Went back to the grill. The burger sizzled. The flag on the porch moved in the wind.
Memorial Day at Lejeune. Burgers and potato salad and a flag and a husband and a baby the size of a grape and a father on the phone saying 'I'm proud of him.'
This is the life. All of it. The pride and the fear and the potato salad.
The potato salad I made that Memorial Day was imperfect — too much mustard, potatoes a little soft — but it was Mom’s recipe, and that made it exactly right for the day. Below is the version I’ve been working toward: a classic red potato salad built for patriotic holidays, the kind of dish that earns a spot on every backyard table from Memorial Day through the Fourth of July. It’s the formula Mom put on that recipe card, cleaned up and dialed in, so you don’t have to learn it the same way I did — through love and a little too much mustard on the most solemn Monday of the year.
Patriotic Holiday Red Potato Salad
Prep Time: 20 min | Cook Time: 20 min | Total Time: 40 min (plus 1 hr chilling) | Servings: 8
Ingredients
- 3 lbs small red potatoes, scrubbed and quartered
- 1 tsp salt, plus more for boiling water
- 4 large eggs, hard-boiled, peeled and chopped
- 3 stalks celery, thinly sliced
- 1/2 medium yellow onion, finely diced
- 3/4 cup mayonnaise
- 1 1/2 tbsp yellow mustard
- 2 tbsp sweet pickle relish
- 1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
- 1/2 tsp black pepper
- Paprika, for garnish
Instructions
- Boil the potatoes. Place quartered red potatoes in a large pot and cover with cold salted water by 1 inch. Bring to a boil over high heat, then reduce to a steady simmer. Cook 12–15 minutes, until potatoes are just fork-tender but still hold their shape. Do not overcook — they should not be falling apart. Drain and spread on a baking sheet to cool for 15 minutes.
- Hard-boil the eggs. While potatoes cook, place eggs in a small saucepan and cover with cold water. Bring to a boil, then remove from heat, cover, and let sit 11 minutes. Transfer to an ice bath, peel when cool, and chop into rough 1/2-inch pieces.
- Make the dressing. In a large bowl, whisk together mayonnaise, mustard, pickle relish, apple cider vinegar, 1 tsp salt, and black pepper until smooth and combined.
- Combine. Add the cooled potatoes, chopped eggs, celery, and onion to the bowl with the dressing. Fold gently with a rubber spatula until everything is evenly coated, being careful not to break up the potatoes.
- Chill. Cover the bowl and refrigerate at least 1 hour before serving. The flavor improves as it sits — overnight is even better.
- Serve. Dust the top lightly with paprika before bringing to the table. Serve cold.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 285 | Protein: 7g | Fat: 16g | Carbs: 30g | Fiber: 3g | Sodium: 420mg
About the cook who shared this
Rachel Abernathy
Week 113 of Rachel’s 30-year story
· San Diego, California
Rachel is a twenty-eight-year-old Marine wife and mom of two who has moved five times in six years and learned to cook a Thanksgiving dinner with half her cookware still in boxes. She married young, survived postpartum depression, and feeds her family of four on a junior Marine's salary with a freezer full of pre-made meals and a crockpot that has never let her down. She writes for the military spouses who are cooking dinner alone in base housing and wondering if they're enough. You are.
