Basil Dill Coleslaw

Father's Day. Year six. The first Father's Day since the pandemic where I can be at Roberto's house, at his grill, in person, without fear. I drove to Maryvale at 10 AM with the smoker in the truck bed and the kids in the back seat and the specific joy of a man who is going to stand next to his father at a fire and not count the days since the last time or worry about the days until the next.

Roberto was at the grill when I arrived. The cinder block grill, charcoal already white, carne asada marinating on the counter inside. He was wearing his apron and holding his tongs and standing in the morning sun and he looked — for the first time in two years — like himself. Not the pandemic version of himself, the diminished, careful, afraid version. The real Roberto. The man at the grill. The king at his throne.

I set up the smoker next to him and we cooked together. Father and son. Two fires. The smoke mingling in the air above us like a conversation between the generations. He grilled his carne asada. I smoked a pork shoulder. Elena made everything else. Sofia grilled corn (her permanent station, claimed and defended). Diego ran in circles and ate whatever was not nailed down. Jessica sat under the ramada and read and smiled and said nothing because sometimes saying nothing is saying everything.

Sofia's Father's Day card: a drawing of me and Roberto at side-by-side grills, with smoke rising into a sky full of stars. At the bottom she wrote: "Two fires. One family." I am framing this next to the photograph Roberto gave me for my birthday. Two images: past and present. Young Marcus on a milk crate. Adult Marcus with his own smoker. The same fire. The same family. The same love, expressed through charcoal and meat and the refusal to let the coals go out.

Diego's Father's Day gift: a stick. The third stick. I now have three birthday/Father's Day sticks from my son, arranged on my desk at the station like a museum exhibit. Three sticks and a photograph and two drawings and a leather journal and a construction paper menu. The artifacts of a man's life. They are worth more than every trophy in the garage.

At sunset, Roberto and I sat in the Maryvale backyard with the grill cooling and the smoke drifting and the day ending. He said, "Thirty-six years I have been a father." I said, "Six years I have been a father." He said, "It does not get easier." I said, "I know." He said, "It gets better." And then he was quiet, and the desert was quiet, and the fire was quiet, and the evening settled over us like a blessing.

Every great cookout has its unsung hero — the dish that doesn’t get the smoke or the sear or the Instagram moment, but quietly makes every plate complete. At Roberto’s that afternoon, while he and I stood at our fires, Elena was the one who made everything else, and “everything else” is what holds a meal together. This basil dill coleslaw is exactly the kind of thing I reach for when the smoker is running and the pork shoulder needs something cool and bright to sit beside it — herby, a little tangy, no fuss, and ready before the first rack comes off.

Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 0 min | Total Time: 25 min (plus 10 min rest) | Servings: 8

Ingredients

6 cups green cabbage, thinly shredded (about 1/2 medium head)
1 cup red cabbage, thinly shredded
1 cup shredded carrots (about 2 medium)
1/4 cup fresh basil leaves, thinly sliced
2 tablespoons fresh dill, chopped (or 1 teaspoon dried dill)
3 green onions, thinly sliced
1/2 cup mayonnaise
2 tablespoons apple cider vinegar
1 tablespoon sugar
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon salt, plus more to taste
1/4 teaspoon black pepper

Instructions

Shred the cabbage. Thinly slice both cabbages and place them in a large mixing bowl along with the shredded carrots and green onions. Toss to combine.
Make the dressing. In a small bowl, whisk together the mayonnaise, apple cider vinegar, sugar, Dijon mustard, garlic powder, salt, and black pepper until smooth and fully combined.
Combine. Pour the dressing over the cabbage mixture and toss well to coat every strand. Fold in the fresh basil and dill, reserving a small pinch of each for garnish.
Rest and season. Let the coleslaw sit for at least 10 minutes at room temperature so the cabbage softens slightly and the flavors meld. Taste and adjust salt or vinegar as needed.
Garnish and serve. Transfer to a serving bowl, scatter the reserved basil and dill over the top, and serve alongside smoked pork shoulder, carne asada, or any grilled main.

Nutrition (per serving)

Basil Dill Coleslaw — The Side Dish Elena Always Brings to the Grill