By One week knowing I am pregnant. I have not told many people. Tyler and I agreed to wait until twelve weeks for the wider announcement. I have told Gloria. I told her on Sunday and she cried and did not say I knew it was about time this time, she just said: oh, Savannah. And the way she said my name had everything in it. The whole history. The girl who arrived at fifteen with three bags and no winter coat in a green Goodwill coat that James had found. And this moment. And everything between.
I have not told Crystal yet. I am not ready to share this with Crystal. I want to hold it a while longer in the smaller circle, the circle that does not require explaining or processing. The wider circle of Crystal is for later. I know she would be glad. I just want to be glad first before I introduce any complexity.
Gloria made a blessing over the food Sunday. She does not usually say grace, that is a church thing and she saves it for church, but this Sunday she said a few quiet words over the meal before we ate. She said something about gifts that come when they are ready and receiving them with open hands. I am trying to receive this with open hands. The terror is real. The joy is larger. I am holding both and trusting the joy to stay bigger.
Gloria’s blessing that Sunday — her words about open hands and gifts that arrive when they’re ready — stayed with me all the way into the kitchen the next morning. I wanted to make something that carried that same feeling: something shaped with care, something that looked like tenderness made edible. These Woolly Butter Lambs are what I came back to, because a lamb on a Sunday table, after a prayer like hers, felt like the most honest thing I could offer. I made a full batch and did not explain them to anyone. I just set them out and let them be what they were.
Woolly Butter Lamb
Prep Time: 30 min | Cook Time: 15 min | Total Time: 1 hr (includes chilling) | Servings: 24 cookies
Ingredients
- 1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened to room temperature
- 3/4 cup powdered sugar, sifted
- 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
- 2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
- 1/4 teaspoon fine salt
- 1 1/2 cups white buttercream or stiff royal icing, for decorating
- 48 mini chocolate chips or small raisins (2 per cookie, for eyes)
- Optional: small ribbon or sprig of rosemary for garnish
Instructions
- Cream butter and sugar. In a large bowl, beat the softened butter and powdered sugar together on medium speed until pale and fluffy, about 3 minutes. Scrape down the sides of the bowl.
- Add vanilla. Mix in the vanilla extract until just combined.
- Incorporate flour. Add the flour and salt all at once. Mix on low speed until a soft dough comes together and pulls away from the sides of the bowl. Do not overmix.
- Chill the dough. Flatten the dough into a disc, wrap in plastic wrap, and refrigerate for 30 minutes until firm enough to roll.
- Preheat and prep. Preheat the oven to 350°F. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper.
- Roll and cut. On a lightly floured surface, roll the chilled dough to about 1/4-inch thickness. Cut out lamb shapes using a lamb-shaped cookie cutter (or a rounded oval body with a small circle head). Re-roll scraps once.
- Bake. Place cutouts on prepared baking sheets about 1 inch apart. Bake for 12 to 15 minutes until the edges are just barely golden and the centers look set. Do not overbake — they should stay very pale and tender.
- Cool completely. Transfer cookies to a wire rack and let cool completely before decorating, at least 20 minutes.
- Decorate the wool. Transfer buttercream or royal icing to a piping bag fitted with a small star or grass tip. Pipe small rosette or pull-up tufts across the body of each lamb to create a woolly texture, leaving the face area plain.
- Add eyes. Press two mini chocolate chips or small raisins gently into the face of each lamb for eyes. Let icing set for 15 minutes before serving or stacking.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 148 | Protein: 1g | Fat: 9g | Carbs: 16g | Fiber: 0g | Sodium: 44mg