Sweet & Spicy Chicken Wings

Memorial Day, and the Lowcountry remembers — not just the wars but the daily casualties, the people who served and returned and were never quite the same, the people who served and did not return at all. Daddy preached about Memorial Day every year at Tabernacle Baptist, not because he was a veteran but because he believed that remembering was the work of the church, and the church's work was the work of every family that gathered around a table and said grace over food that the dead could not eat.

We had a cookout — the annual one, Robert at the grill, James managing the charcoal with the new authority of a man who has completed a year of college and considers himself qualified for fire. Mama sat on the piazza in her chair and Joy sat beside her, and the two of them watched the smoke rise from the grill and drifted into a silence that was not uncomfortable but companionable — the silence of two women who have shared a lifetime of proximity and who no longer need words to occupy the space between them.

I have been reading through the group home paperwork with the thoroughness of a librarian processing an acquisition — every form, every clause, every policy. Magnolia House requires a medical evaluation, a psychological assessment, a family interview. The process is designed to be careful, and I respect the carefulness even as I dread the completion, because the completion means Joy moves, and the moving means the family contracts, and the contraction is a loss even though the loss is also a relief.

Carrie's senior year approaches. She will be eighteen in December. She will graduate in June. She will leave for Emory in August. The future arrives in a series of dates that I can see on the calendar like approaching headlights — bright, inevitable, illuminating the road between here and there. I am not ready for the there. No mother ever is. But the readiness is not the point. The point is the walking. The point is the letting go.

I made barbecue ribs — Robert's recipe, the one he learned from his father, the one Blackwood tradition in a kitchen dominated by Simmons women. The ribs were smoky and tender and falling off the bone, and Robert stood at the grill with the quiet pride of a man who has contributed one dish to a family that cooks thousands, and the one dish is perfect, and the perfection is his.

Robert’s ribs were the centerpiece that afternoon, as they always are — but these sweet and spicy wings have become the dish that fills the grill between batches, the one James hovers closest to and the one Carrie has started requesting by name. I wrote the recipe down this year for the first time, partly because I realized I’ve been making them from memory for a decade, and partly because the girls won’t always be home for Memorial Day, and some things deserve to be written before they have to be remembered.

Prep Time: 15 minutes | Cook Time: 45 minutes | Total Time: 1 hour | Servings: 6

Ingredients

3 lbs chicken wings, split at joints, tips removed
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1 teaspoon black pepper
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 cup honey
1/4 cup hot sauce (such as Frank’s RedHot)
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar
1 teaspoon red pepper flakes
1 tablespoon unsalted butter
Sliced scallions and sesame seeds for garnish (optional)

Instructions

Season the wings. Pat chicken wings thoroughly dry with paper towels — this is the step that gives you crispy skin. Toss in a large bowl with olive oil, salt, pepper, and garlic powder until evenly coated.
Grill over medium-high heat. Arrange wings on a grill preheated to medium-high (about 400°F). Grill for 20–25 minutes, turning every 5–6 minutes, until the skin is golden and charred at the edges and the internal temperature reads 165°F. (Alternatively, bake on a wire rack set over a rimmed baking sheet at 425°F for 40–45 minutes, flipping once halfway through.)
Make the glaze. While the wings cook, combine honey, hot sauce, soy sauce, apple cider vinegar, and red pepper flakes in a small saucepan over medium heat. Stir and simmer for 3–4 minutes until the glaze thickens slightly and coats the back of a spoon. Remove from heat and stir in butter until melted and glossy.
Toss and glaze. Transfer the cooked wings to a large bowl. Pour the warm glaze over the wings and toss to coat thoroughly. For deeper caramelization, return glazed wings to the grill for 2–3 minutes per side until the glaze sets and chars slightly.
Serve. Arrange on a platter and garnish with sliced scallions and sesame seeds if desired. Serve immediately — these do not wait well, and they never have to.

Nutrition (per serving)

Sweet & Spicy Chicken Wings — The Grill Belongs to Robert