Something is happening at the base. Ryan came home Tuesday with the specific expression he wears when information exists but he can't share it — the tight jaw, the 'I'm fine' that means 'something is happening.' Marines and their clearances. They know things they can't say, and the not-saying is its own communication.
By Wednesday, the rumors were everywhere: PCS orders. The battalion might be moving. Destination: unknown, which in military-spouse language means 'we're moving and nobody will tell us where or when until the last possible moment.'
The MOVING possibility. The thing I've been expecting since I married a Marine. The thing that defined my childhood — seven schools before high school, five states, packing and unpacking and packing. And now it's going to happen to me as an adult, as a wife, as a mother.
I'm ready. Or I should be ready. This is what I trained for. My whole childhood was training for this — the packing, the leaving, the starting over. I know how to do this.
But knowing how to do it and wanting to do it are different things. I LIKE this apartment. I like the yellow nursery and the tiny kitchen and Jen next door and the support group and Dr. Reyes. I like the commissary and the base pool and the Italian restaurant where Ryan proposed. I like the tomatoes growing in the backyard.
I don't want to leave. Which is the most un-military-kid thing I've ever felt. Military kids don't want to leave or stay — they want to survive wherever they're put. But I'm not just a military kid anymore. I'm a military wife and a mother and I've built something HERE and the thought of boxing it up makes me want to sit on the bathroom floor again.
Mom called. I told her about the rumors.
'Where?' she asked.
'Nobody knows yet.'
'Rachel. Listen to me. Whatever happens, you pack the kitchen first.'
'I know, Mom.'
'The cast iron in the car, not the truck.'
'I KNOW, Mom.'
'And the recipe binder goes in your bag. Your personal bag. The one that stays with you.'
She's been through this fourteen times. She knows the drill. She IS the drill.
I made her pot roast tonight. The comfort food. The deployment food. The 'something is happening and I can't control it so I'm making pot roast' food.
The pot roast was good. The rumors are scary. And the recipe binder is already in my bag.
Some lessons you learn once and never forget.
Mom always said the recipe binder goes in your personal bag — the one that stays with you, not the truck — and this is one of the reasons why. When I set the pot roast on the stove Tuesday night, I realized what I actually needed was something I could set and forget, something that would do its quiet, steady work while I sat with the uncertainty. The slow cooker pulled pork was the answer: apple cider for a little sweetness, low heat for a long time, and the kind of smell that makes an apartment feel like home even when you’re already half-dreading leaving it. It’s the recipe that goes in the binder. It’s the recipe that survives every move.
Slow Cooker Apple Cider Pulled Pork
Prep Time: 15 minutes | Cook Time: 8 hours | Total Time: 8 hours 15 minutes | Servings: 8
Ingredients
- 3–4 lbs boneless pork shoulder (pork butt), trimmed of excess fat
- 1 cup apple cider (not apple cider vinegar)
- 1/2 cup apple cider vinegar
- 1/4 cup brown sugar, packed
- 2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce
- 1 tablespoon Dijon mustard
- 1 teaspoon garlic powder
- 1 teaspoon onion powder
- 1 teaspoon smoked paprika
- 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
- 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
- 1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper (optional)
- 1 medium yellow onion, sliced into rings
- Your favorite barbecue sauce, for finishing (about 1/2 cup)
Instructions
- Season the pork. Combine garlic powder, onion powder, smoked paprika, salt, pepper, and cayenne in a small bowl. Pat the pork shoulder dry with paper towels and rub the spice mixture evenly over all sides.
- Layer the slow cooker. Spread the sliced onion rings across the bottom of a 6-quart slow cooker to create a bed for the pork. Place the seasoned pork shoulder on top of the onions, fat side up.
- Mix the braising liquid. Whisk together the apple cider, apple cider vinegar, brown sugar, Worcestershire sauce, and Dijon mustard in a measuring cup until the sugar dissolves. Pour the mixture around (not over) the pork so the spice rub stays intact.
- Cook low and slow. Cover and cook on LOW for 8 hours, or on HIGH for 4 to 5 hours, until the pork is completely tender and shreds easily when pressed with a fork.
- Shred the pork. Transfer the pork to a large cutting board and use two forks to pull the meat into coarse shreds, discarding any large pieces of fat. Skim excess fat from the liquid remaining in the slow cooker.
- Finish with sauce. Return the shredded pork to the slow cooker. Stir in barbecue sauce and 1/4 to 1/2 cup of the reserved cooking liquid to keep the pork moist and saucy. Taste and adjust seasoning. Keep on WARM until ready to serve.
- Serve. Pile onto toasted buns, over mashed potatoes, or alongside roasted vegetables. Leftovers keep refrigerated for up to 4 days and freeze beautifully for up to 3 months.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 310 | Protein: 34g | Fat: 12g | Carbs: 14g | Fiber: 0g | Sodium: 420mg
About the cook who shared this
Rachel Abernathy
Week 160 of Rachel’s 30-year story
· San Diego, California
Rachel is a twenty-eight-year-old Marine wife and mom of two who has moved five times in six years and learned to cook a Thanksgiving dinner with half her cookware still in boxes. She married young, survived postpartum depression, and feeds her family of four on a junior Marine's salary with a freezer full of pre-made meals and a crockpot that has never let her down. She writes for the military spouses who are cooking dinner alone in base housing and wondering if they're enough. You are.