By Fall is here. Real fall. Nashville fall, with the maples turning and the air thinning and the mornings cold enough for a jacket but the afternoons warm enough to regret the jacket. It's my favorite season — the season that feels like the world is getting ready for something, shedding what it doesn't need, preparing for the cold by first being beautiful. I'm shedding too. Shedding the waitress. Shedding the doubt. Keeping the cornbread and the kids and the cast iron skillet and the stubbornness.
At the clinic this week, I did my first full periodontal assessment completely independently — no supervision, no Dr. Whitfield hovering, no safety net. Just me and the patient and the probe and the chart. I measured every pocket, noted every finding, developed the treatment plan, and presented it. The patient — a forty-year-old woman named Danielle — looked at me and said, "You really know what you're doing." I said, "I do." I didn't hedge. I didn't qualify. I didn't say "I'm just a student." I said I DO. Two years ago I couldn't have said that. Two years ago, "I do" felt like a lie. Now it's the truest thing I know.
Peer tutoring is going well. Keisha, my Friday morning student, got an 88 on her first anatomy exam. She texted me: "88!!! Thank you!!!" Three exclamation marks. Three is the exact right number of exclamation marks for an 88 on your first dental exam. I texted back: "That's all you, Keisha." But it's not all her. It's the hour we spent together every Friday. It's the flashcards I made her. It's the parking lot conversation where I told her I cried after my first exam and she said, "You? YOU cried?" and I said, "Everyone cries. The people who don't cry just haven't found their parking lot yet." She has her parking lot. It's the Walgreens parking lot on Gallatin Pike. We all have one.
Chloe lost another tooth — number four. She's running out of baby teeth to monetize. Her tooth fairy savings are $4. She told me she's saving for "college." She is five years old and she is saving for college with tooth fairy money and I will not tell her that $4 does not cover college because the intention is the whole point and the intention is beautiful and I will protect it with my life.
I made a butternut squash soup this week — roasted butternut squash, sauteed onion and garlic, broth, a splash of cream, nutmeg, blended smooth. It's the color of October even though it's only September, and it tastes like the season smells — warm, golden, changing. Jayden ate it because it's orange. Jayden eats everything that's orange. The boy has a color palette and he's consistent with it. Chloe ate it with crackers and said, "This tastes fancy, Mama." It does taste fancy. It cost $3.50. The gap between fancy and cheap is narrower than people think, and I live in that gap, and I cook in that gap, and the gap is where the magic happens.
This soup is the one I made on Wednesday — after the clinic assessment, after Keisha’s 88, after Chloe announced she was saving for college on $4. I needed something that tasted like how the week felt: warm and golden and a little bit proud of itself. Butternut squash soup is my October recipe, my “I know what I’m doing” recipe — simple enough for a Tuesday night with two tired kids, beautiful enough to make Chloe call it fancy. If you’re living in the gap between fancy and cheap, this is your soup.
Roasted Butternut Squash Soup
Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 45 min | Total Time: 1 hr | Servings: 6
Ingredients
- 1 large butternut squash (about 3 lbs), halved lengthwise and seeded
- 2 tablespoons olive oil, divided
- 1 medium yellow onion, roughly chopped
- 4 cloves garlic, minced
- 3 cups low-sodium chicken or vegetable broth
- 1/2 cup heavy cream
- 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
- 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt, plus more to taste
- 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
- Pinch of cayenne (optional)
- Crusty bread or crackers, for serving
Instructions
- Roast the squash. Preheat oven to 400°F. Brush the cut sides of the butternut squash with 1 tablespoon of olive oil and place cut-side down on a lined baking sheet. Roast for 35–40 minutes until the flesh is completely tender and the cut side is lightly caramelized. Let cool for 10 minutes, then scoop the flesh away from the skin and set aside.
- Saute the aromatics. While the squash roasts, heat the remaining 1 tablespoon of olive oil in a large pot or Dutch oven over medium heat. Add the onion and cook, stirring occasionally, for 6–8 minutes until softened and translucent. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute more until fragrant.
- Build the soup. Add the roasted squash flesh and the broth to the pot. Stir to combine and bring to a gentle simmer over medium heat. Cook for 5 minutes to let the flavors come together.
- Blend until smooth. Use an immersion blender directly in the pot to blend the soup until completely smooth, about 1–2 minutes. Alternatively, carefully transfer in batches to a countertop blender, venting the lid to release steam.
- Finish with cream and spice. Reduce heat to low. Stir in the heavy cream, nutmeg, salt, pepper, and cayenne if using. Taste and adjust seasoning. Heat through for 2–3 minutes — do not boil once the cream is added.
- Serve. Ladle into bowls and serve warm with crackers or crusty bread. A light drizzle of cream or a sprinkle of extra nutmeg makes it look as fancy as it tastes.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 185 | Protein: 3g | Fat: 10g | Carbs: 24g | Fiber: 4g | Sodium: 310mg