Onion Soup Mix -- The Gathering That Goes On Without Him

The wild onion gathering happened without Danny for the first time. Not the first time without him — he was absent for several years before he died, absent in the sense that he could not come. But this is the first gathering since his death and that is a different kind of absence. The meadow is the same meadow. The creek is the same creek. The onions are in the same ground they have been in for as long as anyone has been gathering them. The ground does not know about Danny.

Terry came this year. It was her idea. She had not come in years, had stayed home with Danny, and now she came in her good coat and her careful shoes and she walked the meadow at the edge, the same place Danny had sat in his folding chair last year. She did not pick onions — her hands are sore from arthritis, picking is harder now — but she walked and she watched the families spread across the meadow and she said, to nobody in particular but loud enough for me to hear: "He would have been glad to see this."

Kai picked onions. Luna picked onions. Caleb picked onions. I picked onions. The picking is what it always is: the land giving what it gives and the family taking what it offers and being present for the giving. I took the gathered onions home and fried them with eggs Saturday night and served them with bean bread, the traditional meal, the meal I have served after every gathering since the first one Hannah organized. The eggs were exactly right. The onions were sharp and green and exactly themselves. I ate the meal and I said nothing and I thought about everything and the onions tasted the same way they always taste, which is the same way they tasted before I knew them and the same way they will taste after I am gone, and that is not sad. That is exactly right.

I have made this onion soup mix every year since the gatherings became a regular part of my life, and I make it now for the same reason I made it then — because the onions deserve to carry further than one Saturday night, and because having something in the pantry that smells like the meadow is its own kind of continuation. Terry came this year and walked the edge of the field and said what she said, and I thought: the least I can do is make sure the onions last. This mix keeps the flavor close on the days when the meadow is not available, when the grief is quieter but still present, when you need something that tastes like the thing that does not change.

Onion Soup Mix

Prep Time: 5 minutes | Cook Time: 0 minutes | Total Time: 5 minutes | Servings: 12 (approximately 3/4 cup total mix)

Ingredients

• 2/3 cup dried minced onion flakes
• 3 tablespoons beef bouillon powder
• 1/4 teaspoon onion powder
• 1/4 teaspoon dried parsley flakes
• 1/8 teaspoon celery seed
• 1/8 teaspoon black pepper
• 1/8 teaspoon paprika
• Pinch of sugar

Instructions

1. Combine dry ingredients. Add all ingredients to a small bowl and stir thoroughly until evenly combined.
2. Store the mix. Transfer to an airtight jar or sealed bag. Store in a cool, dry place for up to 6 months.
3. To use as soup: Stir 3 tablespoons of mix into 4 cups of boiling water. Reduce heat and simmer for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally, until onions are soft.
4. To use as a dip or seasoning base: Mix 3 tablespoons of the dry blend into 1 cup sour cream or plain yogurt and let rest in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes before serving.
5. Adjust to taste. Add salt carefully, as the bouillon powder already contributes significant sodium. Taste before seasoning further.

Nutrition (per serving, mix only, ~1 tablespoon)

Calories: 20 | Protein: 1g | Fat: 0g | Carbs: 4g | Fiber: 0g | Sodium: 380mg