Mexican Hot Chocolate Cookies

First week of May. The trees on Ridgeland Avenue are full. Mom's lilacs in the side yard have opened. The cemeteries are starting to look planted-up for spring, which I notice every year because I notice cemeteries.

I took the twins to the playground Tuesday after work. Stephanie was there with her twins. We sat on the bench and watched our four kids try to negotiate the swings and we did not interfere. Stephanie has been my friend for two months now and it already feels like longer. We talked about Wally. I told her where things were. She said "I've done this with my mom, I know what this season is." She did not say it would be okay. She knows it would not. Real friends do not say it will be okay; real friends say I see you, I am here, I have been where you are.

Cooking this week was solidly in the rotation. A big tray of enchiladas Sunday — corn tortillas, the rotisserie chicken from Costco shredded, a can of green enchilada sauce, a bag of shredded cheese — that fed us four nights with a side of rice and beans. The twins love enchiladas. Owen calls them "rolled tacos," which is correct. Nora demanded that the cheese on hers be "perfectly even," which I have learned to perform as a service, like a sushi chef.

Saturday Ryan and I took the twins to my parents' for an afternoon so Mom could have a break. We brought lunch — sandwiches from the Italian place on 95th — and ate at the kitchen table. Wally sat in his chair in the dining room and ate half a meatball sub, which was the most he'd eaten in one sitting in two weeks, according to Mom, who tracks these things on a notepad in the kitchen drawer that she does not know I know about. He looked tired but okay. He said "Myszka, the babies are getting tall." I said yes Dziadek. He said "tell them to slow down." I said I would but they wouldn't listen. He laughed. It was a small laugh and it was the best sound I had heard all week.

The enchiladas carried us all the way to Thursday, and Dziadek’s laugh on Saturday was small and real and I kept replaying it on the drive home. That night, after the twins were in bed, I wanted to make something sweet — not complicated, just warm and a little unexpected, the way that whole day had been. These Mexican Hot Chocolate Cookies have been in my rotation for years: cocoa and cinnamon and just enough cayenne to make you pay attention, which felt exactly right for a week that kept asking me to do the same.

Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 11 min | Total Time: 26 min | Servings: 36 cookies

Ingredients

2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp fine salt
1 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon, divided
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
3/4 cup granulated sugar, plus 2 tbsp for rolling
3/4 cup packed brown sugar
2 large eggs
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips

Instructions

Heat the oven. Preheat to 375°F. Line two baking sheets with parchment paper.
Mix the dry ingredients. In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda, salt, 1 tsp cinnamon, and cayenne. Set aside.
Cream butter and sugars. In a large bowl, beat the softened butter with the 3/4 cup granulated sugar and brown sugar on medium speed until light and fluffy, about 2–3 minutes.
Add eggs and vanilla. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then mix in the vanilla extract until fully incorporated.
Combine wet and dry. Add the flour mixture to the butter mixture and stir until just combined. Fold in the chocolate chips.
Make the cinnamon sugar. In a small bowl, stir together the remaining 2 tbsp granulated sugar and 1/2 tsp cinnamon.
Shape and roll. Scoop rounded tablespoons of dough, roll into balls, and roll each ball in the cinnamon sugar to coat. Place 2 inches apart on prepared baking sheets.
Bake. Bake for 9–11 minutes, until the edges are set but the centers still look slightly underdone. Do not overbake — they firm up as they cool.
Cool. Let cookies rest on the baking sheet for 5 minutes before transferring to a wire rack.

Nutrition (per serving)

Mexican Hot Chocolate Cookies — The Sweetest Sound All Week