Lobster Bisque — The Kind of Warmth You Don’t Have to Ask For

Rough week. Caleb got picked up again — possession, same as always, meth, same as always. Mom called me Tuesday night and her voice had that flat quality it gets when she's already cried and decided to stop. I drove to the county jail Wednesday morning before my shift, posted bail with money I should have put toward the truck payment, and took him to Mom's. He sat at the kitchen table looking like a man who'd been wearing his face for thirty years and was tired of it. He's twenty-three. He looks forty.

I made him eat. That's what I do — that's the only intervention I know. I heated up chicken and dumplings that Mom had in the fridge, the Cherokee-style with big flat dumplings in chicken broth, thick and simple and warm. Caleb ate two bowls without looking up. I sat across from him and didn't say anything because what is there to say that we haven't said a hundred times? Get clean. Go to treatment. Think about Mom. Think about yourself. None of it works. The words go in and the meth is louder.

Hannah says the epidemic is a system failure, not a personal one — that meth targets indigenous communities because of poverty and historical trauma and broken health systems, and she's right, she's always right about the big picture. But the big picture doesn't post bail. The big picture doesn't sit at the kitchen table watching your little brother eat dumplings with shaking hands. I love Caleb and I am so angry at him I could put my fist through the wall, and both of those things live in me at the same time, and I don't know what to do with either one.

The rest of the week I threw myself into work and into the kitchen, because fire is the only therapy I trust. Thursday night I made a big pot of corn soup — hominy corn, slow-cooked with pork, another Cherokee staple that Hannah introduced me to properly. Corn soup is the kind of food that doesn't ask anything of you. You just eat it and it holds you together. I needed holding together this week.

Saturday I took Kai to the creek behind Mom's house, the one where Dad used to take me fishing. Kai's three and can't hold a rod yet but he stood in the shallows and slapped the water with a stick and scared every fish within a mile, and I sat on the bank and watched him and felt something loosen in my chest that had been tight since Tuesday. Kids don't know they're healing you. That's what makes it work.

Luna's a month old now. She's starting to focus her eyes on things, to track movement, to look at you like she's deciding whether you're worth the trouble. She's got Hannah's intensity already. I held her Saturday night while the corn soup simmered and told her about the creek and the fish Kai didn't catch, and she grabbed my finger and held on. That's enough. Some weeks, that's all you get, and you take it with both hands.

The bisque had been on my mind all week—something rich and slow-feeling even though it comes together fast, the kind of dish that warms you from the center out. Holding Luna Saturday night, feeling her grip my finger while the stock heated on the stove, I understood why I’d reached for this one: it’s food that holds you the same way she did, quietly and without asking anything back. Here’s how I made it.

Lobster Bisque

Prep Time: 10 min | Cook Time: 10 min | Total Time: 20 min | Servings: 4

Ingredients

• 1 quart lobster stock, see recipe here
• 6 tablespoons butter, divided
• 6 tablespoons all-purpose flour
• 2 cups heavy cream
• Lobster meat from two medium-sized cooked lobsters, about 1/2 to 3/4 pounds of lobster meat cut up into bite sized pieces
• Chopped chives, for garnish

Instructions

1. Heat the stock. Place the lobster stock in a 2-quart sauce pan and heat to just short of boiling.
2. Make the roux. While stock is heating, in a small saute pan, melt 4 tablespoons of butter then add 6 tablespoons of flour and cook over medium low until the roux is brown (chestnut color).
3. Combine stock and roux. Whisk the hot roux into the hot stock to combine.
4. Add the cream. Add the cream and whisk again and heat just to hot then remove from heat.
5. Saute the lobster. In another small saute pan, melt remaining two tablespoons of butter over medium heat and add the cut up cooked lobster meat and saute just to heat through.
6. Serve. Place the bisque in a cup or bowl and place some of the cooked lobster in and over the top.
7. Garnish. Garnish with chives.

Nutrition (per serving)

Nutrition information not available.