By Thanksgiving. First without Sean. Grace drove down. She sat with me and the kids Thursday morning and rode with us to Southie. The three-decker was full. My mother had done the turkey. The cornbread I had made Wednesday was still warm. The deviled eggs — sixty again — were packed and labeled. I had added caraway and a little whole-grain mustard to the filling this year because I had been thinking about grain mustard in November and wanted to try it. They were good. People ate them all.
Sean Sr. said grace. He paused at "for whom we have lost." He did not say Sean's name. He did not need to. My mother cried. Grace cried. I did not cry. I had cried Wednesday night. I had cried Thursday morning in the shower. I was ready.
Liam sat next to my father at the table. My father put his hand on Liam's shoulder several times throughout the meal. Nora sat next to Grace. Grace fed her pieces of turkey. Nora ate a plate and a half. Liam ate two plates. Danny (in from New London) sat across from me and said "Kate" and squeezed my hand across the table. I squeezed back.
Father Donnelly came for dessert. He blessed the pies. He said "Sean Donovan is at this table, even if not in a chair. He is in this food, in these faces, in these children." We all nodded. My mother handed him a slice of apple pie.
At 8 PM I took the kids home. Liam slept in the car. Nora slept in the car. I carried them into bed. I sat in the kitchen with a cup of tea at 10. Grace was still up in the guest room with a book. I went and sat with her for twenty minutes. We did not talk much. She said "Kate. Sean would have been proud of you today." I said "thank you, Grace." She kissed my forehead. I went to bed. I slept six hours. A Thanksgiving done.
Father Donnelly blessed the pies that night, and I have been thinking about that moment ever since — the way something as simple as a pie on a table can hold an entire room together. The apple pie my mother set in front of him was made with a lard crust, the same way her mother made it, and I want to share that recipe here because it is the one that deserves to keep going. It is not fussy. It is honest. It is the kind of crust you can make on a Wednesday when you are already holding a lot, and it will not let you down.
Lard Pie Crust
Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 0 min (shell only) | Total Time: 1 hr 15 min (includes chill) | Servings: 8 (one 9-inch double crust)
Ingredients
- 2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
- 1 tsp salt
- 1 tsp granulated sugar
- 3/4 cup cold lard, cut into 1/2-inch pieces
- 6–8 tbsp ice water
Instructions
- Mix dry ingredients. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, salt, and sugar until combined.
- Cut in the lard. Add the cold lard pieces to the flour mixture. Using a pastry cutter or your fingertips, work the lard into the flour until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs with some pea-sized pieces remaining. Work quickly so the lard stays cold.
- Add ice water. Drizzle 6 tablespoons of ice water over the mixture one tablespoon at a time, tossing gently with a fork after each addition. Stop adding water when the dough just holds together when pinched — do not overwork it.
- Divide and chill. Turn the dough out onto a lightly floured surface. Divide into two equal disks, flatten each slightly, and wrap in plastic wrap. Refrigerate for at least 1 hour, or overnight.
- Roll out. Remove one disk from the refrigerator and let it sit for 5 minutes. On a lightly floured surface, roll from the center outward into a circle about 12 inches in diameter and 1/8-inch thick. Fit into a 9-inch pie plate, trimming any overhang to 1 inch.
- Fill and top. Add your filling of choice. Roll out the second disk and lay it over the filling. Crimp the edges to seal, cut steam vents in the top crust, and bake according to your filling recipe’s instructions.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 310 | Protein: 4g | Fat: 20g | Carbs: 28g | Fiber: 1g | Sodium: 295mg