March. Danny's anniversary week. Eight years.
I went to Holy Cross Cemetery on Monday — March 8th, the actual date. Cold, clear, a winter sun that gives light without warmth. Danny's headstone. Fresh flowers from Rachel.
I sat on the ground. I didn't bring food this time. I brought words.
"Eight years, Danny. I'm twenty-four. You're still sixteen. The gap is a canyon now. I have a career, a platform, a dream that's about to become real. You have a headstone and a number on my wrist and a stool at a shop that doesn't exist yet."
"I got your stool, though. Stool number eight. It'll be at the counter, right where you can see the kitchen. You'll watch me make pierogi and you'll give me grief and I'll pretend to be annoyed and we'll both know the truth: that you're the reason I keep going on the days when I want to stop. Because you didn't get to keep going. So I go for both of us."
The cemetery was quiet. The sun was bright. I stayed for an hour.
Dinner at the Katz house. In person, indoors, vaccinated. Rachel made brisket. I brought pierogi. Steve poured wine. We talked about Danny — the funny stories, the embarrassing stories, the stories that make you laugh until you cry and then keep crying because the laughter reminded you of the person who's missing.
Rachel said, "Jake, Danny would have been at your shop every day." Steve said, "He would have never paid." I said, "I know. Stool eight. Free food forever." They smiled. The smiles were sad and real and enough.
The March RecipeSpinoff piece: "Eight Years and a Number." About Danny. The first time I've written about him publicly. About losing a best friend at seventeen, about carrying grief alongside purpose, about the number 8 on my wrist and the stool at a shop that will carry his name in its own quiet way. The recipe is smash burgers — Danny's food, the food of the grave visits, the simplest tribute I know.
I cried writing it. I'll cry when people read it. Some stories need tears the way dough needs water — without them, nothing holds together.
Danny’s food was never fancy — it was loud and saucy and gone before you could blink, the kind of thing you eat standing up at a counter while someone gives you grief about taking the last one. These Bang Bang Chicken Sliders carry that same energy: simple, a little reckless, deeply satisfying in the way only unpretentious food can be. I made them the night I got home from Holy Cross, because I needed to cook something and because cooking has always been how I talk to him when words run out. Stool eight is waiting, Danny — and so is the plate.
Jimmy’s Bang Bang Chicken Sliders
Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 20 min | Total Time: 35 min | Servings: 12 sliders
Ingredients
- 1 1/2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken breasts, cut into 12 pieces
- 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
- 2 eggs, beaten
- 1 cup panko breadcrumbs
- 1 tsp garlic powder
- 1 tsp smoked paprika
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 1/2 tsp black pepper
- 2 tbsp vegetable oil, for frying
- 12 slider buns
- 1 cup shredded lettuce
- 1/2 cup sliced pickles
- Bang Bang Sauce:
- 1/2 cup mayonnaise
- 3 tbsp sweet chili sauce
- 1 tbsp sriracha
- 1 tsp honey
Instructions
- Make the sauce. Whisk together mayonnaise, sweet chili sauce, sriracha, and honey in a small bowl until smooth. Refrigerate until ready to use.
- Set up your dredging station. Place flour in one shallow bowl, beaten eggs in a second, and panko mixed with garlic powder, smoked paprika, salt, and pepper in a third.
- Coat the chicken. Dredge each chicken piece in flour, shaking off the excess, then dip in egg, then press firmly into the seasoned panko to coat all sides.
- Pan-fry the chicken. Heat vegetable oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Cook chicken pieces in batches, 4—5 minutes per side, until golden brown and cooked through (internal temperature 165°F). Do not crowd the pan.
- Toast the buns. While chicken rests, split slider buns and toast cut-side down in the same skillet for 1—2 minutes until lightly golden.
- Assemble. Spread a generous spoonful of bang bang sauce on both cut sides of each bun. Layer shredded lettuce on the bottom bun, add a chicken piece, top with pickle slices, close with the top bun, and serve immediately.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 310 | Protein: 21g | Fat: 13g | Carbs: 27g | Fiber: 1g | Sodium: 480mg
About the cook who shared this
Jake Kowalski
Week 258 of Jake’s 30-year story
· Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Jake is a twenty-nine-year-old brewery worker, newlywed, and proud Polish-American from Milwaukee's Bay View neighborhood. He didn't start cooking until his grandmother Babcia Helen passed away and left behind a stack of grease-stained recipe cards. Now he makes pierogi from scratch, smokes meats on a balcony smoker his landlord pretends not to notice, and writes for guys who want to cook good food but don't know a roux from a rub.