Honey Oat Pan Rolls -- Denise's Dinner Rolls, Made Ready

The house was quiet in the way houses with grown children are quiet — a quiet that contains memory. The week was a spring week, the kind where the light through the kitchen window arrives at a particular angle and the freezer hums in a different register depending on the temperature in the garage. I made notes in my prep notebook on Sunday afternoon, the way I always do: meal name, ingredient list, cost per serving, prep time, freezer instructions. Twenty-eight bags. Two hours and eleven minutes. A little slow this week, by my standards, but Brandon was helping and the conversation was good, and I have learned, slowly and against my own grain, that the conversation is sometimes the point and the time is sometimes a courtesy I extend to my husband for being willing to chop onions on a Sunday afternoon.

The children are doing what they do, which is the central report of every week of my adult life. Ethan, 19, is at BYU studying international development. He still cooks chicken adobo for me when he comes home for Sunday dinner. Olivia is 18, at BYU studying elementary education — the path she chose at age seven and has not deviated from once. Mason is 15, finishing high school, with calluses on his hands and a plan that does not yet have words. Lily is 13, in high school, asking the kind of questions in Sunday School that make the teachers uncomfortable, which I find difficult and also, secretly, admirable. Noah is 11, the comedian, the performer — the kid who does an impression of my disappointed face in front of company, and gets away with it. That is the family report. I do not have a system for these reports. I just listen and remember and call back when I said I would call back, which is most of the time and not all of the time, and the difference between most and all is the territory of motherhood.

The recipe of the week was Denise's dinner rolls, which I have made some specific number of times in my life and have refined to a system that I now hand to other people in printed form. The version I made this week fed eight, cost under fifteen dollars, and required twenty-six minutes of active prep, which is within my requirements and not a coincidence. The freezer in the garage is the freezer of record. The freezer in the pantry is the freezer of convenience. The distinction matters. I have stopped explaining the freezer-meal philosophy to people who already follow my work, and I have stopped apologizing for it to people who do not. The philosophy is simple: tomorrow is coming whether you are ready or not. You can either be ready or not. I pick ready.

I prayed on Thursday morning for the first time in two weeks, which the therapist would call worth noting. I noted it. I am still a Latter-day Saint. I am also a woman who has sat in front of a casket the size of a bread box. I do not see those two things as contradictions, but I do not pretend they sit easily together either. The bench in the chapel where I sit on Sunday is the same bench. The woman is not. The faith makes room for the woman. That is what I have learned to ask of it.

Dinner is in the freezer. Tomorrow is coming. I am ready.

These are Denise’s rolls — the ones I’ve made enough times to have the recipe memorized and still choose to write down. The honey and oats give them just enough substance to feel like something you made with intention, and they freeze beautifully, which is the whole point. Brandon chopped onions while I shaped these, and we talked the way you talk when the house is quiet and the afternoon is yours, and that is exactly the right context in which to make a pan of rolls.

Honey Oat Pan Rolls

Prep Time: 30 min | Cook Time: 20 min | Total Time: 2 hr 50 min (includes rise time) | Servings: 24 rolls

Ingredients

• 1 cup old-fashioned rolled oats, plus more for topping
• 1 cup boiling water
• 2 1/4 teaspoons active dry yeast (1 standard packet)
• 1/3 cup warm water (110°F)
• 1/3 cup honey, divided
• 1/4 cup unsalted butter, softened
• 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
• 2 large eggs, room temperature
• 3 1/2 to 4 cups all-purpose flour
• 2 tablespoons milk, for brushing

Instructions

1. Soften the oats. Place rolled oats in a large bowl and pour boiling water over them. Stir briefly and let stand for 20 minutes until oats have absorbed the water and the mixture has cooled to lukewarm.
2. Activate the yeast. In a small bowl, combine warm water, yeast, and 1 tablespoon of the honey. Stir and let sit for 5 to 10 minutes until foamy.
3. Build the dough. To the oat mixture, add the remaining honey, softened butter, salt, and eggs. Stir to combine. Add the yeast mixture and stir again. Add flour 1 cup at a time, mixing until a soft, slightly sticky dough forms. You may not need all 4 cups.
4. Knead. Turn dough onto a lightly floured surface and knead for 8 to 10 minutes until smooth and elastic, or use a stand mixer with a dough hook on medium speed for 6 minutes.
5. First rise. Place dough in a lightly greased bowl, turning once to coat. Cover with plastic wrap or a clean kitchen towel and let rise in a warm spot for 1 to 1 1/2 hours, until doubled in size.
6. Shape the rolls. Punch dough down and divide into 24 equal pieces. Shape each into a smooth ball and place in a greased 9x13-inch baking pan (or two 9-inch round pans), spacing them close together.
7. Second rise. Cover and let rolls rise for 30 to 45 minutes, until puffed and touching.
8. Finish and bake. Preheat oven to 375°F. Brush tops of rolls gently with milk and sprinkle with a pinch of rolled oats. Bake for 18 to 22 minutes until golden brown on top and the internal temperature reads 190°F.
9. Cool and serve. Let rolls cool in the pan for 5 minutes before serving. For freezing, cool completely, wrap tightly in foil, and seal in a freezer bag. Reheat from frozen at 300°F for 15 minutes.

Nutrition (per serving)

Calories: 145 | Protein: 4g | Fat: 3g | Carbs: 26g | Fiber: 1g | Sodium: 155mg