Hawaiian Haystacks

Ethan's basketball camp started Monday. I drove him to the rec center at eight in the morning with the windows down because the AC in the van is doing the thing where it blows air that is technically cooler than the air outside but not cool enough to qualify as air conditioning, and Ethan didn't complain, which is how I know he's my son and not some changeling, because eleven-year-old boys complain about everything except the things that actually matter. He got out, grabbed his bag, said "bye Mom" without looking back, and walked through those double doors like he knew exactly where he was going. I sat in the parking lot for three minutes and cried. Not grief crying — regular crying. The kind where your kid does something ordinary and the ordinariness is so beautiful you can't stand it.

The house is loud with summer. All five of them, home or nearly home, orbiting the kitchen like planets around a sun made of peanut butter and bread. Olivia starts swim lessons next week. Mason's church day camp is the last week of June. Lily is in her preschool enrichment program three mornings a week, which gives me ninety minutes alone with Noah, and Noah and I have developed a routine: we go to the grocery store. He rides in the cart. He points at things. I buy some of them. We are a team.

Wednesday I made Hawaiian haystacks — one of those meals that sounds complicated and isn't. You make rice, you make a simple chicken gravy, and then you set out bowls of toppings: shredded chicken, pineapple, coconut, chow mein noodles, cheese, peas. Everyone builds their own plate. The kids love it because they get to choose. I love it because it costs about eight dollars to feed all seven of us — six of us — and nobody argues about what's on their plate because they put it there themselves. Mason put cheese on everything including the pineapple. Lily ate only rice and coconut and declared it "the best dinner ever," which tells you everything about Lily's palate and nothing about my cooking.

Brandon came home Thursday with sunburn on his nose from a work lunch on a patio and I told him he looked like a lifeguard and he laughed, and the laugh startled both of us, because laughter has been scarce in this house and we've forgotten what it sounds like between us. It was small. It was a Thursday. I'll take it.

Hawaiian Haystacks has been our go-to on the weeks when I need dinner to do something I can’t—bring everyone to the table without any fight left in them. After a Thursday that gave us a laugh we didn’t expect and a week that reminded me we’re still figuring out how to be six instead of seven, I wanted something that let everybody just…choose their own thing, put it on their plate, and be okay. Here’s how I make it.

Prep Time: 10 minutes | Cook Time: 20 minutes | Total Time: 30 minutes | Servings: 6

Ingredients

For the rice and gravy:

3 cups long-grain white rice, uncooked
1 lb boneless, skinless chicken breasts or thighs, cooked and shredded (rotisserie works perfectly)
2 cans (10.5 oz each) cream of chicken soup
1 1/2 cups low-sodium chicken broth
1/2 cup sour cream
1/2 tsp garlic powder
Salt and black pepper to taste

Topping bar (set out in small bowls):

1 can (20 oz) pineapple tidbits, drained
1 1/2 cups shredded cheddar cheese
1 1/2 cups chow mein noodles
3/4 cup sweetened shredded coconut
1 cup frozen peas, thawed
4 green onions, thinly sliced
1/2 cup sliced black olives (optional)
1/2 cup slivered almonds (optional)

Instructions

Cook the rice. Prepare rice according to package directions. For 3 cups dry rice, combine with 6 cups water in a large pot, bring to a boil, reduce heat to low, cover, and cook 18 minutes. Fluff with a fork and keep warm.
Make the gravy. In a medium saucepan over medium heat, whisk together cream of chicken soup, chicken broth, and garlic powder. Stir frequently until smooth and warmed through, about 5 minutes. Remove from heat and stir in sour cream. Taste and season with salt and pepper. Keep warm on low.
Shred the chicken. If using a rotisserie chicken, pull the breast and thigh meat and shred with two forks. If cooking from raw, poach chicken breasts in lightly salted water for 15–18 minutes until cooked through, then shred. Stir shredded chicken into the warm gravy.
Set out the topping bar. Arrange all toppings in individual small bowls down the center of the table or along the counter. This is the part everyone looks forward to — the more options, the better.
Build and serve. Each person starts with a scoop of rice, ladles chicken gravy over the top, then piles on whatever toppings they want. Serve immediately while the gravy is hot.

Nutrition (per serving)

Nutrition estimated with rice, gravy, chicken, pineapple, cheese, chow mein noodles, coconut, and peas. Varies based on toppings chosen.

Hawaiian Haystacks — The $8 Build-Your-Own Dinner That Ends Every Argument About What’s on the Plate