By One week pregnant, officially, and I am keeping it quiet except for the people who needed to know immediately and the people who will know when the time is right. Babcia Rose is in the first category. I went to see her on Wednesday and I sat across from her and before I could say anything she looked at me for a long moment and said: you are pregnant. I said yes. She closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them and said good. Just that. Good. And then she asked when and I said October or November and she said she would be there and I said I know Babcia Rose and she reached across the table and patted my hand and that was the whole conversation and also everything.
I have been slightly nauseous this week, which the books say is normal and which Ryan has been responding to with a level of practical care that I find both touching and slightly excessive. He bought ginger ale. He bought crackers. He researched first trimester nausea and presented me with a list of evidence-based interventions in the format of a briefing, which is a very Ryan way to handle a medical situation. I ate the crackers and drank the ginger ale and made saltine-and-butter sandwiches at 11 PM that are approximately the most comforting thing I have ever eaten.
The first anniversary is in two weeks: June 19th, one year married. I am making cacio e pepe as planned and I am also growing a person, which is the best possible first anniversary development. We talked about whether to tell more family before or after the anniversary. We decided after — wait until twelve weeks, the standard caution, which is late July. I can hold this until late July. I am very good at holding things until it is time.
The blog has no idea. The blog will know when the time comes. For now I am writing about summer vegetables and early pregnancy crackers and the very specific joy of knowing something this large and keeping it in the room just between us.
Those 11 PM saltine-and-butter sandwiches were their own kind of magic, but once the nausea settled into something more manageable, I wanted a cracker I could actually feel a little proud of — something with flavor, something I made myself. Flavored oyster crackers turned out to be exactly that: still gentle, still simple, still the kind of thing you eat by the handful on the couch, but with just enough seasoning to feel like a small act of intention during a week that was mostly about holding a very large secret very carefully close.
Flavored Oyster Crackers
Prep Time: 5 minutes | Cook Time: 15 minutes | Total Time: 20 minutes | Servings: 8
Ingredients
- 12 oz oyster crackers
- 1/2 cup vegetable oil or melted butter
- 1 packet (1 oz) dry ranch seasoning mix
- 1 teaspoon dried dill weed
- 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
- 1/2 teaspoon onion powder
- 1/4 teaspoon lemon pepper (optional)
Instructions
- Preheat. Preheat your oven to 250°F (120°C) and line a large rimmed baking sheet with parchment paper.
- Mix the coating. In a large bowl, whisk together the oil or melted butter, ranch seasoning, dill, garlic powder, onion powder, and lemon pepper if using.
- Toss the crackers. Add the oyster crackers to the bowl and toss gently but thoroughly until every cracker is evenly coated with the seasoning mixture.
- Spread and bake. Pour the coated crackers onto the prepared baking sheet in a single layer. Bake for 15 minutes, stirring once halfway through, until the crackers are lightly golden and the seasoning is set.
- Cool and store. Remove from the oven and allow to cool completely on the pan. Store in an airtight container at room temperature for up to one week — if they last that long.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 210 | Protein: 3g | Fat: 12g | Carbs: 23g | Fiber: 1g | Sodium: 380mg