Easiest-Ever Fudge

My week. The kids had a snow day on Monday — Detroit Public got hit with eight inches and called school. I burned a vacation day. We spent the morning shoveling the front walk together. Aiden took the job seriously. Zaria mostly threw snow at me and at her brother and at the bushes. By ten I had the walk clear and the kids had snow inside their boots and we all came in wet and tired and starving. I made grilled cheese — sourdough, sharp cheddar, a little bit of mayo on the outside of the bread instead of butter, which is a trick I picked up from a YouTube video and which makes the crust crisper than butter alone. Tomato soup from a can, but heated with a little extra cream and pepper and a sprinkle of dried basil to make it feel less like a can. Aiden dunked his sandwich. Zaria refused to dunk on principle. Both ate every bite.

Tuesday Aiden had a math worksheet that gave him trouble — long division with remainders. I had to look up how to do long division because I haven't done it since 1998 and the way they teach it now has different boxes and arrows than the way I learned. Twenty minutes on YouTube refreshed me enough to help him. I sat at the kitchen table with him for an hour. He got it. The teacher will probably grade me too if she ever sees the worksheet. Cooking and homework — the two skills nobody told me being a single dad would require, both of which I've had to learn on the fly, both of which I'm now passable at.

Wednesday Zaria had a stuffed animal funeral for the elephant she'd had for two years that suddenly developed a tear in its trunk. She demanded a ceremony. We sang a song she made up on the spot ("Goodbye elephant, you were nice") and buried it in the trash can with full honors. She cried real tears. I made her macaroni and cheese for dinner — the baked kind, not the box, because the situation called for the heavy artillery. Elbow macaroni, butter and flour roux, milk, sharp cheddar, a little Velveeta for creaminess (don't tell anybody), salt, pepper, a pinch of nutmeg. Topped with breadcrumbs and baked at 350 until bubbly. She ate two bowls and forgot about the elephant.

Thursday was Valentine's Day at Aiden's school — a week late, because Detroit Public schedules things on its own clock. He needed to bring valentines for twenty-two classmates. I bought a box at Meijer with little Spider-Man cards. Wrote his name on each one Wednesday night while he watched, because he wanted me to do it but also wanted to feel involved. He's at that age — wants my help and wants his independence and doesn't know how to want both at the same time. I do.

Friday was my birthday eve. I'm thirty-five next week — Saturday, March second. The kids don't know yet. Brianna will probably remind them. Or maybe she won't. We're polite now but there's no warmth left between us, just logistics. I made myself an early birthday dinner: ribeye steak, cast iron seared with butter and garlic and rosemary, baked potato, sautéed spinach. Ate it standing at the counter while the kids ate chicken nuggets at the table. They wanted nuggets. I wanted steak. We negotiated and everybody won.

Aiden’s school Valentine’s Day was already a week late, and by the time we’d finished writing his name on twenty-two Spider-Man cards, I had exactly enough energy left for something that required almost nothing from me — but still felt like a treat. This fudge is that thing. Three ingredients, one pot, no thermometer, no performance. You just melt it, pour it, and let it set while you go do the next thing on the list, because there’s always a next thing on the list.

Prep Time: 5 min | Cook Time: 10 min | Total Time: 2 hrs 15 min (includes chilling) | Servings: 24 pieces

Ingredients

3 cups semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 can (14 oz) sweetened condensed milk
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
1/4 teaspoon fine sea salt

Instructions

Prep the pan. Line an 8x8-inch baking dish with parchment paper, leaving overhang on two sides so you can lift the fudge out cleanly. Lightly grease the parchment with butter or nonstick spray.
Melt the base. In a medium saucepan over low heat, combine the chocolate chips, sweetened condensed milk, and butter. Stir constantly with a silicone spatula until completely melted and smooth, about 6—8 minutes. Do not rush this over higher heat or the chocolate can scorch.
Finish and pour. Remove the pan from heat. Stir in the vanilla extract and salt. Pour the mixture immediately into the prepared baking dish and spread evenly with your spatula.
Chill until set. Transfer the dish to the refrigerator and chill for at least 2 hours, or until the fudge is firm throughout. For cleaner cuts, chill overnight.
Cut and serve. Use the parchment overhang to lift the fudge onto a cutting board. Slice into a 6x4 grid for 24 even pieces. Store in an airtight container in the refrigerator for up to 2 weeks, or at room temperature for up to 5 days.

Nutrition (per serving)

Easiest-Ever Fudge — What I Made After Writing Twenty-Two Valentine’s Cards