Dill Bread — The Loaf I Bake Every Passover Because Some Things Must Not Change

Passover is in two weeks — the first Passover without Marvin at the table. The first seder in forty years where his chair will not be at the table, where his voice will not join the blessings, where the question "Why is this night different from all other nights?" will have an answer that is not liturgical but personal: because he is not here. Because the man who sat at this table and carved the brisket and said the prayers and held the Haggadah is in a room in Cedarhurst, and the room has a recliner but not a seder table, and I will bring him matzo and charoset and brisket, but I will not bring him the family, because the family is here, at this table, where his place is set but his chair is empty.

I set his place. I debated this for days — whether to set his place or not, whether the empty plate and the empty chair and the empty glass would be a tribute or a torture — and I decided: yes. His place is set. His plate is there. His Haggadah is there. The place is his. He is not in it, but it is his, and the setting of it is my statement: you are at this table. You will always be at this table. Your place does not expire because you are elsewhere. Your place is permanent. I set it. I set it with the same linen napkin and the same silver and the same glass, and the setting is the protest, the refusal, the insistence that absence is not the same as gone.

I made the brisket. I made the matzo ball soup. I made the gefilte fish. I made the charoset. I made everything, for fourteen people, as I have always made it, because the food does not change, the recipe does not change, and the chain does not break, and the breaking would be the changing, and I will not change, not this, not the Passover food, not the table, not the place setting with the empty chair that says: he was here. He is still here. The brisket is proof.

I have baked this dill bread every Passover for as long as I can remember — it sits in the bread basket between the gefilte fish and the matzo, and Marvin always tore off the first piece before I could even set it down. This year I baked it anyway. The recipe did not ask me whether he would be at the table. The dough does not know about the empty chair. I mixed it and shaped it and let it rise, and when it came out of the oven it smelled exactly the way it has always smelled, and that sameness was the point, and the point was this: we are still here, and so is the bread.

Dill Bread

Prep Time: 20 minutes + 1 hour rise | Cook Time: 35 minutes | Total Time: 1 hour 55 minutes | Servings: 12 slices

Ingredients

• 2 1/4 teaspoons active dry yeast (1 packet)
• 1/4 cup warm water (105–110°F)
• 1 cup cottage cheese, small curd
• 2 tablespoons granulated sugar
• 1 tablespoon butter, softened
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 egg, lightly beaten
• 2 tablespoons fresh dill, chopped (or 2 teaspoons dried dill weed)
• 1 tablespoon dried minced onion
• 2 1/4 to 2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 tablespoon melted butter, for brushing
• Flaky sea salt, for topping (optional)

Instructions

1. Activate the yeast. In a small bowl, combine the warm water and yeast. Stir gently and let sit for 5 to 10 minutes, until foamy and fragrant.
2. Warm the cottage cheese. In a small saucepan over low heat, warm the cottage cheese until it reaches about 110°F — just body temperature, not hot. Remove from heat.
3. Mix the wet ingredients. In a large bowl, combine the warmed cottage cheese, sugar, butter, salt, baking soda, egg, dill, and dried minced onion. Stir until well combined. Add the activated yeast mixture and stir again.
4. Incorporate the flour. Add flour 1/2 cup at a time, stirring after each addition, until a soft, slightly sticky dough forms. You may not need the full 2 1/2 cups. The dough should pull away from the bowl but remain tender.
5. Knead the dough. Turn the dough onto a lightly floured surface and knead for 5 to 8 minutes, until smooth and elastic. Add flour a tablespoon at a time only if the dough is unworkably sticky.
6. First rise. Place the dough in a lightly greased bowl, turning once to coat. Cover with a clean kitchen towel or plastic wrap and let rise in a warm spot for 1 hour, or until doubled in size.
7. Shape and pan. Punch the dough down gently. Shape it into a round loaf and place it in a well-greased 9-inch round cake pan or cast iron skillet. Cover and let rest for 15 minutes.
8. Bake. Preheat the oven to 350°F. Bake the bread for 30 to 35 minutes, until the top is deep golden brown and the loaf sounds hollow when tapped on the bottom.
9. Finish. Remove from the oven and immediately brush the top with melted butter. Sprinkle with flaky sea salt if desired. Let cool in the pan for 10 minutes before turning out onto a wire rack.

Nutrition (per serving)

Calories: 148 | Protein: 6g | Fat: 3g | Carbs: 24g | Fiber: 1g | Sodium: 230mg