Cool Beans Salad -- The Soup That Held Us Together

First full week at home after the surgery. Sean slept a lot. He ate small things. He read a book I had put on his nightstand. He walked from the bedroom to the kitchen to the back porch and back by Saturday and was pleased with himself. Grace was here through Thursday and then went back to Worcester for the weekend. My mother came Thursday and Friday. Someone was always here. I was at the clinic Tuesday and Wednesday for half days. I went back not because I wanted to but because the schedule I had worked out in advance said Tuesday and Wednesday and because I needed the shape of a normal week to survive this week.

Dr. Mehta called Friday. Final molecular pathology is in. It is the thing I had been bracing for — IDH-wildtype, MGMT unmethylated. The specific configuration that narrows the range of favorable outcomes. She did not use the word "glioblastoma" on the phone; she used "high-grade glioma with glioblastoma features" which is medical diplomacy for the same thing. She said she was sorry. She said the surgical result was still excellent and that the tumor board wanted to proceed with combined radiation and temozolomide starting in approximately three weeks. She is referring Sean to radiation oncology (Dr. Kalb at Dana-Farber) and medical oncology (Dr. Pei) for consults next week. I thanked her. I wrote everything down. I hung up. I stood in the kitchen.

I went upstairs. Sean was reading. I sat on the edge of the bed. I told him. He closed his book. He said "okay." He said "what are my options." I said "we do the standard protocol. Radiation and temozolomide for six weeks. Then chemo-only rounds for up to twelve months." I said "we ask the radiation oncologist about advanced techniques. We ask the medical oncologist about clinical trials. We are going to ask about everything." He said "okay, Kate." He said "I want to keep teaching as long as I can." I said "we will ask. They may clear you to teach through radiation." He said "that is what I want." He said "I need you to tell me what you think. Not as my wife. As a nurse." I said "I think you have a long, hard fight. I think you have a chance. I think we do everything. I think we do it together."

I did not lie to him. I have been clear with myself that I will not lie to him. He will ask me questions a non-nurse would not ask. I will answer them as fully as I can. The lie would insult us both. The truth is what we have.

Liam started preschool Thursday. Sean did the drop-off, slowly, in the car with me driving. He stayed in the car. I walked Liam in. Liam was excited. He wore his new sneakers. He showed Miss Alicia the stuffed elephant he had brought from home. He did not cry at drop-off. I walked out. I got in the car. Sean was looking out the windshield. He said "he had a good first day." I said "he did." We drove home. Sean went back to bed. I went to work.

I made lentil soup this week. Sean's stomach is still recovering. Lentil is gentle. It was warm. I made a big pot. Grace and my mother and I ate it for three days.

The lentil soup I made that week was not from a recipe I looked up — it was the thing my hands knew how to do when everything else felt impossible to control. I wanted something that would be easy on Sean’s stomach, something that would stretch across three days and feed whoever walked through the door, something warm that didn’t ask anything of anyone eating it. This cool beans salad — full of soft legumes, gentle spices, and nothing sharp or heavy — is the closest thing in my rotation to what I made that week: nourishing, simple, and steady.

Cool Beans Salad

Prep Time: 15 minutes | Cook Time: 0 minutes | Total Time: 15 minutes | Servings: 6

Ingredients

• 1 can (15 oz) black beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 can (15 oz) kidney beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 can (15 oz) chickpeas, drained and rinsed
• 1 can (15 oz) lentils, drained and rinsed
• 1/2 red onion, finely diced
• 1 red bell pepper, diced
• 1 celery stalk, thinly sliced
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
• 1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice
• 1 teaspoon ground cumin
• 1/2 teaspoon smoked paprika
• 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
• Salt and black pepper to taste
• 2 tablespoons fresh parsley, chopped

Instructions

1. Drain and rinse. Open and drain all four cans of beans and lentils. Rinse them thoroughly under cold water and let them drain fully in a colander.
2. Prep the vegetables. Dice the red onion, red bell pepper, and celery. Keep the pieces small and even so every bite has a little of everything.
3. Make the dressing. In a small bowl, whisk together the olive oil, red wine vinegar, lemon juice, cumin, smoked paprika, and garlic powder until combined. Season with salt and black pepper.
4. Combine. In a large bowl, gently toss the beans, lentils, and vegetables together. Pour the dressing over and stir to coat evenly.
5. Rest and serve. Let the salad sit for at least 10 minutes before serving so the flavors come together. Garnish with fresh parsley. Serve at room temperature or chilled. Keeps well in the refrigerator for up to three days.

Nutrition (per serving)

Calories: 280 | Protein: 13g | Fat: 8g | Carbs: 38g | Fiber: 11g | Sodium: 320mg