Chocolate and Raspberry Cheesecake

I turned fifty years old this week and I have been trying to figure out how I feel about it. The honest answer is: fine. Better than fine. Strangely, unexpectedly good. I thought fifty might arrive with some darkness, some mourning for the years behind, but it landed instead with a quality of light that I can only describe as clarifying. Like turning fifty is a pair of glasses you've needed for a long time and didn't know it.

Gary planned the celebration with a care and attention that nearly undid me. He didn't throw a party — he knew better — but he organized a weekend. Friday night: dinner at the restaurant where we had our first real date, thirty-one years ago, which still exists and still has that same corner table. Saturday: a drive to the coast, just the two of us, with a picnic I didn't know about until he handed me a basket. Sunday: the whole family at our house, a backyard gathering with the garden in full late-June bloom.

The picnic basket contained things he knows I love: a thermos of really good coffee, a half-wheel of the aged cheddar I keep for special occasions, strawberries from the farm stand, and a small container of the lemon curd I taught him to make about fifteen years ago. He made the lemon curd himself. When I opened the container and recognized it, I had to look out at the water for a moment before I could speak.

At the backyard party, Ethan and Olivia gave toasts that were so sincere and so funny in equal measure that the entire table was both crying and laughing simultaneously. Noah called in from Portland and the phone sat propped against a flower vase so he could be at the table with us. Clara stood on her chair to see better. Henry fell asleep in Mia's arms. The garden was soft with evening light and everything smelled of the roses Gary planted in the new yard specifically for this summer.

Fifty. I am a cookbook author, a YouTube host, a wife, a mother, a grandmother. I am someone who grows herbs and makes lemon curd and still cries when she talks about her sister. I am exactly who I set out to become, plus a few things I never could have predicted. That seems like exactly enough.

After a weekend that gave me so much — that corner table, that picnic basket, Gary’s homemade lemon curd, Clara standing on her chair — I wanted to bake something in return, something that felt equal to the occasion. This Chocolate and Raspberry Cheesecake is what I came to: it’s layered and a little dramatic and deeply, unapologetically rich, which is exactly how I’d like to think about fifty. I’ve made it for other people’s milestones for years, and it felt right, finally, to make it for my own.

Prep Time: 35 min | Cook Time: 1 hr 10 min | Total Time: 6 hrs (includes chilling) | Servings: 12

Ingredients

For the crust:
1 3/4 cups chocolate graham cracker crumbs (about 14 full crackers)
3 tablespoons granulated sugar
6 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
For the filling:
24 oz (3 packages) full-fat cream cheese, room temperature
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup packed light brown sugar
1/3 cup unsweetened Dutch-process cocoa powder, sifted
3 large eggs, room temperature
1/2 cup sour cream, room temperature
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
4 oz semi-sweet chocolate, melted and slightly cooled
For the raspberry topping:
1/2 cup seedless raspberry jam
1 tablespoon water
6 oz fresh raspberries
For the chocolate ganache drizzle:
3 oz semi-sweet chocolate, finely chopped
1/3 cup heavy cream

Instructions

Prepare the pan and preheat. Preheat your oven to 325°F (163°C). Wrap the outside of a 9-inch springform pan tightly with two layers of heavy-duty aluminum foil. Lightly grease the inside of the pan.
Make the crust. In a medium bowl, combine the chocolate graham cracker crumbs, sugar, and melted butter. Stir until the mixture resembles wet sand. Press firmly and evenly into the bottom of the prepared springform pan. Bake for 10 minutes, then set aside to cool while you prepare the filling.
Beat the cream cheese. In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment (or using a hand mixer), beat the cream cheese on medium speed for 2–3 minutes until completely smooth and fluffy. Scrape down the sides as needed.
Add sugars and cocoa. Add the granulated sugar, brown sugar, and sifted cocoa powder. Beat on medium-low speed until fully incorporated, about 2 minutes. Scrape the bowl again.
Add eggs one at a time. With the mixer on low, add the eggs one at a time, mixing just until each is incorporated before adding the next. Do not overmix — this keeps the cheesecake from cracking.
Finish the batter. Add the sour cream, vanilla extract, and melted chocolate. Mix on low speed until just smooth and uniform. Pour the filling over the cooled crust and smooth the top with an offset spatula.
Bake in a water bath. Place the foil-wrapped springform pan in a large roasting pan. Pour enough hot water into the roasting pan to come 1 inch up the sides of the springform pan. Bake at 325°F for 60–70 minutes, until the edges are set but the center 2 inches still jiggle slightly when gently shaken.
Cool gradually. Turn off the oven and crack the door open about 1 inch. Let the cheesecake rest in the oven for 1 hour. Remove from the water bath, discard foil, and let cool to room temperature on a wire rack, about 1 additional hour.
Chill. Cover loosely with plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 4 hours, or overnight for best results.
Make the raspberry topping. In a small saucepan over low heat, warm the raspberry jam and water together, stirring until thinned and smooth. Let cool to room temperature. Arrange fresh raspberries over the top of the chilled cheesecake, then gently brush or spoon the jam glaze over them.
Make the ganache. Place the chopped chocolate in a small heatproof bowl. Heat the heavy cream in a small saucepan until just simmering, then pour over the chocolate. Let sit for 1 minute, then stir from the center outward until smooth and glossy. Let cool for 5 minutes until slightly thickened, then drizzle over the cheesecake.
Serve. Run a thin knife around the edge of the pan before releasing the springform. Slice with a clean sharp knife, wiping between cuts for neat slices. Serve chilled.

Nutrition (per serving)

Chocolate and Raspberry Cheesecake — The Cake I Made to Mark Fifty Years Well Lived