Chicken — Green Chile Stuffed Shells — The Freezer Meal That Held Us Together

First day back. Monday, August 3rd, 2020. I dropped Elijah at Mama's at 7:15 AM. He was asleep in the car seat. I carried him inside and Mama took him without a word — just took him, settled him into the crook of her arm, and said, "Go. He's fine. Go." Go. The word that separates the mother from the baby. The word that sends you out the door and into the world and leaves the best part of you in a woman's arms in an apartment in Antioch. I went. I went to the car and I sat for three minutes and I breathed and I did not cry because I am a professional and professionals drive to work without crying (I cried at the first red light, but by the second light I was done, and by the parking lot I was Sarah Mitchell, dental hygienist, mother of three, and the tears were in the rearview).

The office is different. Masks, shields, plastic barriers between the waiting room chairs. The patients are nervous. The staff is nervous. Everyone is nervous in a way that manifests as aggressive friendliness — too-bright smiles behind masks, too-loud greetings, the energy of people who are relieved to be back but aware that "back" is not the same as "normal." Dr. Whitfield said: "Welcome back, Mitchell." Two words. Maximum Whitfield. The consistency is comforting.

I pumped in the staff bathroom at noon. The pump, the bottle, the timer, the bag, the freezer in the break room where I store the milk next to Brian's yogurt and the communal ketchup. The intimacy of pumping at work is a special kind of indignity — you are producing food for your baby in a bathroom stall while your coworkers eat sandwiches on the other side of the wall. But the indignity is also a victory. The indignity means: I'm here. I'm working. I'm earning. And my baby is still eating what I make, even from ten miles away. The milk is my longest-range recipe. The milk is the meal that travels.

I picked Elijah up at 5:30 PM. Ten hours. The longest I'd been away from him since he was born. Mama met me at the door with: "He was perfect. Ate three bottles. Slept twice. Smiled at the ceiling fan." The ceiling fan relationship continues. Elijah has a friend and it's a ceiling fan and I'm choosing not to be jealous of a household appliance.

I reheated the chicken and rice casserole from the freezer. The first of five meals. The system worked. The meal was warm. The children were fed. Day one: survived. Four more. Then the dumplings. I can see the dumplings from here. The dumplings are waiting. The dumplings are patient. Like me. Like all Mitchells. Patient and waiting and holding on.

I made these shells the week before I went back, during one of those strange suspended afternoons when Elijah was asleep on my chest and I somehow convinced myself I could batch-cook with one free hand. They went into the freezer in a foil pan labeled “Day 1” in my handwriting, which felt optimistic at the time and felt like a lifeline at 5:45 PM on Monday when I was still in my work scrubs and three children needed dinner and I had nothing left. Green chile and cheese and chicken: warm in forty minutes, no decisions required. That’s exactly the kind of recipe Day 1 deserves.

Chicken & Green Chile Stuffed Shells

Prep Time: 25 min | Cook Time: 40 min | Total Time: 1 hr 5 min | Servings: 6

Ingredients

• 20 jumbo pasta shells
• 2 cups cooked chicken, shredded
• 1 can (4 oz) diced green chiles, drained
• 1 cup ricotta cheese
• 1 1/2 cups shredded Monterey Jack cheese, divided
• 1/2 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese
• 1 egg, lightly beaten
• 1 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cumin
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 1 can (10 oz) green enchilada sauce
• 1/2 cup sour cream
• 2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro, for garnish (optional)

Instructions

1. Cook the shells. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Cook jumbo shells 1–2 minutes less than package directions (they’ll finish in the oven). Drain, rinse with cold water, and lay flat on a baking sheet to cool.
2. Make the filling. In a large bowl, combine shredded chicken, green chiles, ricotta, 3/4 cup Monterey Jack, cheddar, egg, garlic powder, cumin, salt, and pepper. Stir until evenly mixed.
3. Make the sauce. Whisk together the enchilada sauce and sour cream in a small bowl until smooth. Spread half the sauce evenly across the bottom of a 9x13-inch baking dish.
4. Fill the shells. Spoon about 2 tablespoons of filling into each shell and arrange them seam-side up in the prepared baking dish in a single layer.
5. Top and bake. Pour the remaining sauce over the filled shells. Sprinkle with the remaining 3/4 cup Monterey Jack. Cover tightly with foil and bake at 375°F for 30 minutes. Uncover and bake an additional 10 minutes until bubbly and lightly golden.
6. Freezer instructions. To freeze before baking: assemble through step 4, cover tightly with plastic wrap then foil, and freeze up to 3 months. Thaw overnight in the refrigerator, then bake as directed, adding 10–15 minutes covered if still cold.
7. Serve. Let rest 5 minutes before serving. Garnish with fresh cilantro if desired.

Nutrition (per serving)

Calories: 420 | Protein: 32g | Fat: 18g | Carbs: 34g | Fiber: 2g | Sodium: 780mg