By Yom Kippur. I fasted. I prayed. I sat in the synagogue and David sat beside me and the cantor sang Kol Nidre and I did not cry, because I have run out of tears for Kol Nidre, which is not true — I have not run out of tears, I have simply learned to hold them until the car, which is where the tears live now, in the driver's seat, in the parking lot, in the private space between the public composure and the private grief.
I broke the fast with eleven people. Bagels, lox, coffee cake. The food of restoration. The food that says: you survived. You endured twenty-five hours without eating, which is a metaphor for everything else you are enduring without, and the without has become your normal, and the normal is the bagel and the lox and the cream cheese, and the eating after the fast is the living after the loss, and the living is the table, and the table holds.
I brought Marvin a break-fast plate. He ate the bagel with cream cheese. He did not know about the fast. He did not know about the atonement. But the eating after the deprivation is universal, the body's gratitude for food after absence, and Marvin's body is grateful for the bagel, and the gratitude is enough.
The coffee cake and bagels were already on the table when I thought about what I would bring again next year — something small and savory, something that does not demand too much of a body just returning to itself after twenty-five hours of absence. These egg and cheese muffins are that thing: modest, protein-rich, easy to hold in one hand while you stand at the counter and let the relief of eating wash over you. Marvin ate his bagel with cream cheese and did not know the name of what the day meant, but the body knows restoration when it tastes it, and these muffins are restoration in miniature.
100-Calorie Cheese, Vegetable and Egg Muffins
Prep Time: 10 minutes | Cook Time: 20 minutes | Total Time: 30 minutes | Servings: 12 muffins
Ingredients
- 6 large eggs
- 4 large egg whites
- 1/2 cup low-fat shredded cheddar cheese
- 1/2 cup diced red bell pepper
- 1/2 cup diced zucchini
- 1/4 cup diced yellow onion
- 1/4 cup skim milk
- 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
- 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
- 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
- Nonstick cooking spray
Instructions
- Preheat oven. Heat oven to 350°F. Spray a standard 12-cup muffin tin generously with nonstick cooking spray or line with silicone liners.
- Sauté the vegetables. Lightly sauté the bell pepper, zucchini, and onion in a small nonstick skillet over medium heat for 3–4 minutes until just softened. Set aside to cool slightly.
- Whisk the egg mixture. In a large bowl, whisk together the eggs, egg whites, milk, garlic powder, oregano, salt, and pepper until fully combined.
- Divide and fill. Distribute the sautéed vegetables evenly among the muffin cups. Pour the egg mixture over the vegetables, filling each cup about 3/4 full. Top each cup with a pinch of shredded cheddar.
- Bake. Bake for 18–22 minutes, until the muffins are set in the center and lightly golden at the edges. A toothpick inserted in the center should come out clean.
- Cool and serve. Let the muffins rest in the tin for 5 minutes before removing. Serve warm or at room temperature. Store leftovers in an airtight container in the refrigerator for up to 4 days.
Nutrition (per serving)
Calories: 100 | Protein: 9g | Fat: 5g | Carbs: 3g | Fiber: 0.5g | Sodium: 180mg