Brunch Berry Pizza

One month. Hana is one month old. She weighs nine pounds. She has discovered her hands — she stares at them with the intensity of a philosopher encountering a new idea, turning them over, examining the fingers, occasionally putting a fist in her mouth and looking surprised by the result. She has my eyes, dark and serious. She has James's chin, small and determined. She has Jisoo's hands — small, quick, already grasping at things with a specificity that feels Korean to me, though I know that is not scientifically defensible.

I am surviving on three-hour sleep cycles and miyeokguk and the Sunday calls with Kevin, which are now my lifeline. Kevin asks how I am. Not how the baby is — how I am. He says, "Steph. How are you. Not Hana. You." Nobody else asks this. Everyone asks about Hana. Kevin asks about Stephanie. He is the only person who understands that the mother is also a person, and the person needs asking about. I told him this on Sunday and he said, "Steph. I spent a decade being a person nobody asked about. I know what it feels like. So: how are you." I said, "Tired. Happy. Tired." He said, "That tracks."

James is back at Microsoft but working from home two days a week, which helps enormously. On home days he takes the 6 AM feeding so I can sleep until 8, which feels like sleeping until noon, which is the recalibration of pregnancy: your standards for luxury plummet until a two-hour nap feels like a spa day.

Maternity leave from Amazon starts March 1. Ten more days. I am counting. The idea of not attending sprint reviews for sixteen weeks fills me with a relief so profound it borders on spiritual. I am going to spend sixteen weeks with Hana. Sixteen weeks of feeding her, holding her, watching her hands, cooking for us, sleeping when she sleeps. Sixteen weeks of being a mother and only a mother. I have never been only anything. This will be new.

The recipe this week is a quick dakjuk — chicken rice porridge — that has become my go-to one-pot comfort meal. Chicken thigh, shredded. Rice, rinsed. Garlic, minced. Ginger, grated. Chicken stock. Combine everything in a pot, bring to a boil, reduce to a simmer, cook for forty minutes until the rice has broken down into a thick porridge. Season with soy sauce, sesame oil, and a drizzle of perilla oil if you have it. Top with sliced scallions and a soft-boiled egg. Eat in a bowl on the couch at 3 PM because that is when the baby is napping and that is when you eat now. The schedule belongs to Hana. Everything belongs to Hana. The porridge understands this.

The dakjuk gets me through the 3 AM hours — it always will — but on the days James is home and takes the early feeding and I actually wake up at 8 feeling something adjacent to human, I want something that isn’t savory, something that feels like a small celebration of having slept. This brunch berry pizza is that thing: ten minutes of effort, one pan, eaten in wedges on the couch while Hana stares at her hands and I stare at her. It is sweet and a little tangy and requires almost no thought, which is exactly the amount of thought I have available right now.

Prep Time: 10 min | Cook Time: 12 min | Total Time: 22 min | Servings: 4

Ingredients

1 pre-made pizza crust or large flatbread (about 12 inches)
8 oz cream cheese, softened
3 tablespoons honey, divided
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon lemon zest
1 cup fresh strawberries, hulled and sliced
1/2 cup fresh blueberries
1/2 cup fresh raspberries
2 tablespoons powdered sugar, for dusting
Fresh mint leaves, for garnish (optional)

Instructions

Preheat oven. Heat oven to 400°F. Place the pizza crust on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
Prebake the crust. Bake the plain crust for 10–12 minutes until lightly golden and crisp. Remove and let cool for 5 minutes.
Make the cream cheese spread. While the crust cools, beat the softened cream cheese with 2 tablespoons of the honey, the vanilla extract, and the lemon zest until smooth and spreadable.
Spread the base. Spread the cream cheese mixture evenly over the cooled crust, leaving about a 1/2-inch border around the edge.
Top with berries. Arrange the strawberry slices, blueberries, and raspberries over the cream cheese layer however you like — neat rows or a relaxed scatter both work.
Finish and serve. Drizzle the remaining tablespoon of honey over the berries, dust lightly with powdered sugar, and garnish with fresh mint if using. Slice into wedges and serve immediately.

Nutrition (per serving)

Brunch Berry Pizza — Something Sweet for the Hours That Belong to Hana