Beer Cheese Potato Soup

The week after the anniversary. The ordinary returning after the sacred. Paul in his wheelchair, reading (Elsa turns the pages on the reading stand — his right hand can barely move now). Me in the garden. Karen in the mornings. The feeding pump at night. The soups and the purees and the thickened coffee during the day. The routine. Routine is mercy. Routine says: the world has a shape. The shape is predictable. You wake, you dress him, you make coffee, you feed him, you garden, Karen arrives, you walk Sven, you come home, you cook, you feed him, Elsa arrives, she reads, you clean, you put him to bed, you set up the feeding pump, you set up the BiPAP, you check the monitor, you get in bed, you listen to the machines, you sleep. The routine is exhausting and sustaining and both of those things at the same time. Paul's right hand is nearly gone now. The typing is slower — one letter takes several seconds, the finger trembling over the keyboard, searching for the key. The sentences are shorter. The smiley faces are harder to find. The communication is narrowing the way the body is narrowing, the world getting smaller letter by letter. The speech therapist recommended an eye-tracking system — a device that lets Paul type by looking at letters on a screen. The eyes move. The cursor follows. The words come. It's the next step, the next adaptation, the next tool. Paul typed (slowly, effortfully): "My eyes still work." Yes. His eyes still work. The eyes that identified ships on the horizon. The eyes that read shipwreck books for forty years. The eyes that looked at me at a church potluck in 1986 and saw something that made him come back the next week and the next. The eyes. The last reliable part of the interface between Paul's mind and the world. I made a simple dinner: cream of potato soup. The soup that asks nothing. The soup of no decisions. Paul ate from the cup — slowly, each swallow a small miracle. He typed (one letter at a time, agonizing): "GOOD SOUP." Two words. Five minutes of typing. The words cost something now. Every word costs. And still he types them. Good soup. Two words. Five minutes. Everything. The routine continues. The machines run. The eyes work. The soup is warm. We are in the routine. The routine holds us.

Cream of potato soup has become my anchor meal — the one I make when the week has asked everything of me and I have nothing left to decide. I vary it by what’s in the refrigerator, and this version, with a splash of beer and melted sharp cheddar, has become Paul’s favorite. It’s thick enough to drink slowly from a cup, warm all the way down, and it costs me almost no thought to make — which is exactly right, because on the evenings when Paul types “GOOD SOUP,” I want every bit of my attention to be on those two words, not on what I’m stirring.

Prep Time: 15 min | Cook Time: 30 min | Total Time: 45 min | Servings: 6

Ingredients

4 tablespoons unsalted butter
1 medium yellow onion, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 (12 oz) bottle lager or amber beer
2 cups chicken broth (low sodium)
1 cup whole milk
1/2 cup heavy cream
4 medium Yukon Gold potatoes (about 1 1/2 lbs), peeled and cut into 1/2-inch cubes
2 cups sharp cheddar cheese, freshly shredded
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1/2 teaspoon smoked paprika
Salt and black pepper to taste
Sour cream, sliced green onions, and extra shredded cheddar for serving (optional)

Instructions

Soften the aromatics. Melt butter in a large heavy-bottomed pot or Dutch oven over medium heat. Add the diced onion and cook, stirring occasionally, until softened and translucent, about 5 minutes. Add garlic and cook 1 minute more until fragrant.
Build the roux. Sprinkle flour over the onion and garlic. Stir constantly for 1 to 2 minutes to cook out the raw flour taste — the mixture will look paste-like and just begin to smell slightly nutty.
Add the beer. Slowly pour in the beer while whisking continuously to prevent lumps. Let the mixture bubble and thicken for about 2 minutes, still whisking, until it smells less sharp and the foam settles.
Add broth and potatoes. Pour in the chicken broth, milk, and cream. Add the cubed potatoes. Raise heat to bring to a gentle boil, then reduce to a steady simmer. Cook uncovered for 18 to 22 minutes, stirring occasionally, until the potatoes are completely tender and can be easily pierced with a fork.
Blend partially (optional). For a creamy but chunky texture, use an immersion blender to pulse the soup 4 to 5 times — you want some potato chunks remaining. For a fully smooth, cup-drinkable consistency, blend until completely smooth.
Melt in the cheese. Reduce heat to low. Stir in the shredded cheddar a handful at a time, allowing each addition to melt fully before adding the next. Stir in Dijon mustard and smoked paprika. Taste and adjust salt and pepper.
Serve warm. Ladle into bowls or pour into cups. Top with a dollop of sour cream, sliced green onions, and extra cheddar if desired. Serve immediately.

Nutrition (per serving)

Beer Cheese Potato Soup — The Soup That Asks Nothing