Baked Bacon Cheddar Chicken Tenders

One year. April 16, 2018. The earth has gone around the sun since my mother died and the earth doesn't care and the sun doesn't care and the azaleas at Cascade Heights don't care — they're blooming again, pink and white, the same blooms, the same walkway, as if nothing has changed. Everything has changed. Nothing has changed. Both are true. Grief is the space between those two truths.

I went to Cascade Heights. Alone. The kids were at school. Curtis was at a doctor's appointment (his blood pressure, which has been "borderline" since Mama died, because Curtis Jackson's body is grieving even when his face won't). I let myself in. The house was quiet. The kitchen was clean — Curtis keeps it clean, Mama's standard, even though he barely uses it. I stood in the kitchen and I breathed and I waited for the grief to hit and it hit and I let it.

I cooked. I made one dish: Mama's fried chicken. The whole ritual. Buttermilk soak (I'd started it the night before, in my own kitchen, and brought it in a cooler). The Folgers can — I brought it from my counter back to Mama's counter, where it lived for forty years. I seasoned the flour. I heated the oil. I fried chicken in my mother's kitchen, in my mother's skillet, with my mother's blend, on the anniversary of her death, and the kitchen smelled like her and sounded like her and was her, even though she wasn't there. She was there. She is always there. She is in the oil and the flour and the seasoning and the cast iron and the hands — my hands, her hands, our hands.

I ate one piece. A thigh. Her favorite. Standing at the counter. I ate it and I said, "Perfect, Mama." Because it was. Because she made me. Because the chicken is hers and mine and I have carried it through a year of grief and the year didn't break it and the year didn't break me and the chicken is perfect. I wrapped the rest and left it on Curtis's counter with a note: "From Brenda's kitchen. Always." I drove home. I picked up the kids. I made dinner. I set the table. I went on.

Mama’s fried chicken is sacred — I will never publish her exact blend, because some things belong to the hands that made them and the cast iron that held them. But I wanted to give you something close to that feeling: chicken that cracks when you bite it, that fills the kitchen with the kind of smell that makes you stand still for a second and remember. These baked bacon cheddar chicken tenders are my way of honoring that warmth without giving away what’s hers. They’re crispy, they’re golden, they’re the kind of thing you eat standing at the counter with your eyes closed — and that’s close enough.

Prep Time: 20 minutes | Cook Time: 20 minutes | Total Time: 40 minutes | Servings: 4

Ingredients

1 1/2 pounds chicken tenderloins (about 12 pieces)
1 cup buttermilk
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon smoked paprika
1/2 teaspoon onion powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 cup panko breadcrumbs
6 slices bacon, cooked crisp and finely crumbled
1 cup sharp cheddar cheese, finely shredded
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
Cooking spray

Instructions

Soak the chicken. Place chicken tenderloins in a bowl and pour buttermilk over them. Cover and refrigerate for at least 1 hour or up to overnight.
Preheat and prep. Preheat oven to 425°F. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper and set a wire rack on top. Lightly coat the rack with cooking spray.
Season the flour. In a shallow dish, whisk together the flour, garlic powder, smoked paprika, onion powder, salt, black pepper, and cayenne.
Make the coating. In a second shallow dish, combine the panko breadcrumbs, crumbled bacon, shredded cheddar, and melted butter. Toss with a fork until evenly mixed.
Bread the tenders. Remove each tenderloin from the buttermilk, letting excess drip off. Dredge in the seasoned flour, shake off excess, then press firmly into the bacon-cheddar panko mixture, coating all sides.
Arrange and bake. Place coated tenders on the wire rack, leaving space between each piece. Lightly mist the tops with cooking spray. Bake for 18 to 20 minutes, until the coating is deep golden and the chicken registers 165°F internally.
Rest and serve. Let the tenders rest on the rack for 3 minutes so the coating sets up crisp. Serve warm.

Nutrition (per serving)

Baked Bacon Cheddar Chicken Tenders — From Mama’s Kitchen, Always