Asian Smashed Cucumber Salad

May Day. The month of May feels like a change in air pressure after April. Things loosen. Schedules shift. The kids start the countdown to the last day of school that they won't finish for three weeks, and the whole household runs at a slightly different frequency.

Diego has his last baseball games this month before school lets out. He's gotten better as the spring went on — the swing adjustment we talked about stuck, which is rare at ten. Most kids at this age make the adjustment in practice and lose it under game pressure. Diego held onto it. I watched from the bleachers with my arms crossed, looking like I was just watching baseball, when really I was trying not to cheer in a way that would embarrass him. He doesn't want Coach Dad at baseball. He wants Regular Dad. I try my best. Coach Dad leaks out at the edges.

I've been working on a smash burger variation this week — a ball of eighty-twenty beef on the flat top, smashed hard with a spatula, cooked until the edges are lacy and crisp, flipped once, topped with sharp cheddar and roasted green chile. The result is thinner, crispier, with more caramelization than a traditional patty. Lisa called it "different but really good," which from Lisa is a strong endorsement. She doesn't give easy compliments about cooking because she doesn't see the point of complimenting something I should be doing correctly anyway. After twelve years I've learned that the absence of criticism is the highest praise.

The team has been doing voluntary weight training. Turnout is about seventy percent, which is better than last May. The culture is shifting. When I first got to this school, the weight room was empty in the offseason. Now I have to remind them to rest. When they believe in what they're building, the work becomes a choice they're proud to make.

Twins asleep by seven-thirty, which gave Lisa and me two hours of quiet. We watched half a documentary about national parks. She fell asleep on my shoulder. I watched the whole thing. Best Monday I've had in a while. These quiet evenings are the ones I don't write about enough.

The burger got all the attention that night — rightfully so — but what actually pulled the whole plate together was this smashed cucumber salad on the side. Something about the cool, garlicky crunch against the crispy, caramelized beef just worked, and honestly it’s the kind of dish that comes together fast enough that you don’t feel like you’re cooking a second thing at all. Lisa didn’t comment on it, which, after twelve years, I’m choosing to count as a win.

Prep Time: 10 minutes | Cook Time: 0 minutes | Total Time: 20 minutes | Servings: 4

Ingredients

2 medium English cucumbers (about 1 1/2 lbs)
1 tsp kosher salt
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 tbsp rice vinegar
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 1/2 tsp toasted sesame oil
1 tsp sugar
1/2 tsp red pepper flakes (or to taste)
1 tbsp chili oil (optional, for extra heat)
2 green onions, thinly sliced
1 tsp toasted sesame seeds

Instructions

Smash the cucumbers. Place cucumbers on a cutting board and use the flat side of a large knife or a rolling pin to firmly smash them until they crack and split. Cut them into 1 to 1 1/2 inch irregular pieces.
Salt and rest. Toss cucumber pieces with kosher salt in a colander set over a bowl. Let sit for 10 minutes to draw out excess moisture, then shake off and pat gently dry with paper towels.
Make the dressing. In a small bowl, whisk together the minced garlic, rice vinegar, soy sauce, sesame oil, sugar, and red pepper flakes until the sugar dissolves. Add chili oil if using.
Toss and combine. Transfer the drained cucumbers to a serving bowl. Pour the dressing over the top and toss well to coat. Fold in the sliced green onions.
Garnish and serve. Top with toasted sesame seeds. Serve immediately for maximum crunch, or refrigerate for up to 30 minutes before serving. Do not dress far in advance or the cucumbers will soften.

Nutrition (per serving)

Asian Smashed Cucumber Salad — The Side Dish That Earned a Real Compliment