Bacon Cheeseburger

Brianna's week. Labor Day Monday so the plant was closed and I had a whole day to myself, which is a dangerous thing to give a man who's been thinking too much. I smoked a small pork shoulder on the Weber Γçö just for me, which is ridiculous, six pounds of pork for one person, but I'd been wanting to try a new rub and nobody was here to judge. Mustard base, brown sugar, smoked paprika, garlic powder, black pepper, cayenne. Low and slow at 225 for ten hours. I wrapped it in butcher paper at the stall and let it ride. Pulled it at 203 internal and let it rest for an hour. Ate it on white bread with pickles and coleslaw standing at the counter like a man with no home training. Mama would be horrified. It was perfect.

Both my babies are in school now. Brianna had Zaria's first day of kindergarten Γçö that was their week and I knew it going in and I was fine with it. I was not fine with it. I wanted to be there. I wanted to see her walk into that building with those pink star sneakers and that attitude. Brianna sent a photo. Zaria's face in the picture is pure Cheryl Γçö chin up, eyes sharp, like she's already assessing the other kids and finding them lacking. I saved the photo and looked at it eleven times on Monday. Twelve. I stopped counting.

Tuesday back at the plant. Jerome asked how the holiday was and I said I smoked a pork shoulder alone in my backyard for ten hours. He looked at me the way you look at someone who needs an intervention. He said brother you need a hobby that includes other humans. I said the pork shoulder didn't talk back or disappoint me. He said that's exactly what he's worried about.

Called the kids Wednesday night. Aiden says third grade is good. Teacher is nice. Zaria says kindergarten is "okay" which from Zaria means she hasn't seized control yet but she's working on it. She told me about a boy named Elijah who wouldn't share the blocks. The way she described it, Elijah will not be a problem much longer. I almost feel sorry for Elijah. Almost.

Sunday dinner at Mama's. Just me and Pop and Mama and Keisha. Small table. Mama made oxtails and rice. Pop was quiet Γçö the diabetes has him tired more than he lets on. His feet are bothering him. I watched him walk to the kitchen and back and counted how many times he steadied himself on the furniture. Three. I didn't say anything. Carters don't say the thing. We just count the times and carry the number.

That pork shoulder taught me something I already knew but needed reminding of — cooking for yourself on purpose, with full effort, is not sad. It’s the opposite of sad. Jerome doesn’t understand that yet, but he will. And when I’m not running a ten-hour smoke, when I want that same backyard energy in under thirty minutes, this bacon cheeseburger is what I come back to — same deliberate seasoning, same standing-at-the-counter satisfaction, same zero apologies for eating something that good entirely alone.

Prep Time: 10 minutes | Cook Time: 15 minutes | Total Time: 25 minutes | Servings: 4

Ingredients

1 1/2 lbs ground beef (80/20 blend)
1 tsp kosher salt
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp smoked paprika
8 strips thick-cut bacon
4 slices sharp cheddar cheese
4 brioche or potato burger buns, toasted
Sliced dill pickles, for serving
Yellow mustard and mayonnaise, for serving
Sliced white onion, for serving (optional)

Instructions

Cook the bacon. In a cast iron skillet or heavy pan over medium heat, cook bacon strips 4—5 minutes per side until crispy. Transfer to a paper-towel-lined plate. Reserve 1 tablespoon of drippings in the pan.
Form the patties. Divide ground beef into 4 equal portions (about 6 oz each). Shape into round patties slightly wider than your buns — they’ll shrink as they cook. Use your thumb to press a shallow dimple into the center of each to prevent puffing.
Season. Combine salt, black pepper, garlic powder, and smoked paprika. Season both sides of each patty generously just before cooking.
Cook the burgers. Heat the skillet with reserved bacon drippings over medium-high heat until shimmering. Add patties and cook 3—4 minutes without pressing down. Flip once and cook another 3 minutes for medium (internal temp 160°F for well done).
Melt the cheese. Place one slice of cheddar on each patty in the final 60 seconds of cooking. Cover the pan briefly to melt.
Toast the buns. While burgers rest, toast buns cut-side down in the same pan for 30—60 seconds until golden.
Build and serve. Spread mustard and mayo on buns. Stack the cheeseburger patty, two strips of bacon, pickles, and onion. Eat it however you want — at the table, at the counter, wherever you are.

Nutrition (per serving)

Bacon Cheeseburger — The Backyard Cure for a Week That Got Away From You